CEASELESSLY (J. HALE)

Dear Calina

this is simply a break from the Victoria nonsense, and a beautiful letter I've been longing to write since Cali's letter to Jasper. 

My Darling Calina.

Since the moment I read your letter, I've been overcome by the million different feelings I have for you. My words will never do justice to the wonder I have when I look at the beautiful, intelligent, and empathetic woman you have become. Your letter so perfectly encapsulated everything I have felt in you since the moment I met you, and I hope that this will convey how much I do love you, Calina Whitlock.

You often speak of my past, I never know quite what fascinates you so about it. I know you refuse to believe that at one time I was far more monster than man, it's a part of me that I cannot be proud of. The man I was is not someone you would be proud of either, and that thought alone is sickening.

From the moment I first laid eyes on you, I knew I could never become that man again. 

I don't ever know how much Alice told you of the things she saw in store for us. Knowing her, it's been everything down to the way your hair was done, and the sweater I was wearing. The first time you appeared in her visions was, for lack of words, incredible. 

The year was 1971, we were completing high school in Belgrave, Montana. I kept my distance from everything and everyone. I think our family had given up hope that someone was waiting for me. Carlisle had pulled us out on a sunny day, and I was sitting next to Alice on our porch.

I think you would have loved that house, it was old and rustic. It fit well in our community, but that's a story for another time. Alice went rigid next to me, an occurrence that didn't phase me in the slightest until she grabbed my arm so hard I thought she would break it clean off.

I can remember feeling so overcome with joy that waved off of her as I waited for her to tell me what she saw.

Her words will forever be with me. 

"Jasper, she's beautiful." was what she said first, and for a moment I had not a clue what she was talking about "You are going to be so happy. Every part of her fits with you perfectly, brother." 

It sunk in after a moment that someone was coming for me, that you existed. Up until that point, I had merely been existing. Calina, had Alice not seen that vision, within months at the longest I would have left the lifestyle we live.

You gave me hope for a future that was wondrous. Your parents must have met that year, and for another sixteen years I waited patiently for another glimpse of you in Alice's vision. I couldn't even truly see you, but I could imagine. 

On March 19th, 1988 in Bridgeport, Connecticut, you appeared in Alice's visions again. All she said was "she's here, Jasper, she's here."

I can remember the elation I felt when she told me, because every moment of my turned life I had waited for someone to share life with. This perpetual existence is lonely, and the emotions grating. I longed for so long for companionship that our family could not give me no matter how hard they tried.

She would see you often, she was more than likely keeping tabs on you the best she could. Everyone hoped we would meet sooner rather than later.

Kate filled me in often, and once you were old enough, sought you out. I don't think any of them truly knew how attached they would become. You have that effect on people. something I admire so dearly.

I will never forget the night you were almost taken from me for the first time. Alice wouldn't tell me what had happened. I can remember the phone call with Kate and her panic. We all can. Suddenly the girl she saw so clearly in my future was ripped away. 

It was then that we knew Alaska was our clear next path, and it led me straight to you.

When I first laid eyes on you, I was so overcome. You were more beautiful, more kind, more loving, and more brave than I had ever pictured. If I could give you everything in the world, I would.

I longed to be by your side, and that's why I didn't flinch when I knew it was time to turn you. I knew that it would wound you deeply, but I am a selfish man. How could I let you go when I just got you?

I do not regret turning you, and never will. My only regret is not being able to give you the human life I know you craved. If I could cure us magically and grow old next to you, I would in a heartbeat. I cannot turn back clocks, but I can promise to make every moment of eternity full of love and beauty.

Calina Rose, I want to give you a life that you can be proud of. I want to, when the time is right, marry you. I want to have a house, I want to take you to see the world. I want to tell every soul how lovely you are, I want to be by your side forever. 

I always have, and always will be your biggest fan. Your story is one that rivals the greatest ever told, and I am honored to be a part of it.

I never knew why I was given a creature so delicate, and so immaculate. I never thought I could deserve a mate like you, and yet you are here. You have made me a changed man, you have loved me when I deserve to be unloved, and you have protected me fiercely.

My beautiful wife, in you I find a calm in the storm. You are shelter, you are love, you are courage. 

Calina Rose Laraunt Cullen Whitlock, however pretentious your name, I will love you forever without an end.

Yours,

Jasper Whitlock