International Love (Harry Styles Fanfiction) ON HOLD: MAJOR REVISION

Chapter 7

The sting on my cheek is a foreign feeling. Clutching my face I feel it start to warm under my palm. I look at Andrew with a mix of emotions. Anger? Surprise? Hatred? I think surprise wins. "You bitch! I gave you everything, and what do I get in return? You betray me by breaking up with me and go for your man on the side and I'm left looking like a fool." While he says this tears are streaming down my face. Not from the pain. That is nothing in comparison to how I feel hearing how broken Andrew is.

He's right. I'm no better than a piece of trash. I feel like a dirty slut. I didn't do anything with Harry but I definitely wasn't wallowing over my freshly opened wounds from my previous relationship. I just moved on like he was yesterday's news. "I'm so sorry. I really do love you." I say between sobs, "I never meant to hurt you, I was only doing what I thought was right." I grab a hold of Andrews large hand and cry. "Nothing, and I mean nothing happened with Harry. He's...he's just being a friend helping me get over what I've done." liar my subconscious says, hey I didn't lie, just left out a few things, I say back. Andrew embraces me. "What you did hurts me both physically and emotionally." I mumble into his chest as I inhale the familiar scent of his laundry and cologne. Perfect.

"I know, I have no idea what came over me. I never thought I was capable of anything like that. I will make sure not to get upset again. You know I would never hurt you intentionally right?" I'm too familiar with this conversation. It's happened at my house before. Only a couple, but I've learned about abusive relationships to know well that this won't end here.

"I don't think I-" I'm cut off my Andrew's lips on mine. My head is spinning. So much has happened today, some good things some bad. What's happened within the last hour is just too overwhelming. As our lips move in synchronization my mind ceases to process anything. Judgment and reason leave me. I'm at the mercy of Andrew. I can't think. I just do.

(Note: will get a little graphic this next paragraph, nothing too bad, but just a heads up)

As Andrew kisses me ruthlessly I'm lying under him with only my underwear on. He kisses me passionately and forcefully. My lips, jaw, neck. He sucks just under my ear causing me to moan. My hands roam his bare back as trails of kisses lead to my collar bone. As his lips move farther down something stirs within me. Not love. Not passion. Fear. Pure fear engulfs me, and panic is starting to set in. We haven't gone anywhere close to this. The closest was just making out. Before I know it I'm pushing Andrew off of me just as he's about to reach my breast.

"No, stop. I can't do this," I say breathlessly. Leaning up I grab the closest shirt that happens to be his. I want to cover up my dignity. I don't feel comfortable with him seeing me. I don't even like my body. Nice curves that are accompanied by some pudginess in my stomach. I don't want anyone seeing that.

Andrew sits up in just his boxers. "Yea, I don't think either of us would want make up sex being our first time." I look down at my lap feeling my face heat up. It's so embarrassing talking about this. Not to mention that we both are virgins. I don't mind being a virgin. I'm waiting until marriage. Remembering my promise to myself I gaze down at my purity ring. The little silver band that has my promise: "I will wait for my true love" inscribed on it.

Shit! I could have lost everything. My precious virginity was almost taken by someone whom I know I don't love. IDIOT! I yell at myself. Stupid girl! I look at Andrew who is standing at the end of the bed with his pants on. I scramble off the bed. and pick up my outfit that was thrown around the room and scurry to the bathroom.

I splash my face with cool water. I look at my reflection in the mirror. "Who are you?" I question. I pull my hair into it's pony tail. This is the Willow I know. I take Andrew's shirt off and put my clothes on. I come out and hand Andrew his shirt back. I watch him put it on and I see his muscles. He's a really attractive guy, but he just doesn't send me that spark of electricity when we are in the same room. He doesn't make my skin tingle when we touch. I feel...nothing. "How long are you staying here? Surly not over night."