If You Can't Be With the One You Love

For A Love That's Impossible

Oliver stands behind a curtain, fastening the buttons on the tuxedo shirt he had been given. He hears Barry begin to speak to him from outside.

"This all just feels weird," he says. He checks himself out through the mirrors that stood in front of him.

"Then maybe you need a different size." Oliver retorts, yelling over the curtains.

Barry sighs. "Not what I meant.

Oliver struggles as he tries to adjust the bow tie around his neck. He speaks through difficulties. "Then what do you mean?"

"This whole weekend just feels off," Barry replies. "It feels like it shouldn't even be happening." Oliver grunts as he finally gets the tie in its proper position. "Ollie, do you need help?"

He hears Barry take steps towards him. "No. I've- I've got it. I've worn these plenty of times."

"I don't even know what to say to her," Barry begins. "I've gone through it in my mind a thousand times yet none of the words feel right."

Oliver clears his throat. "When you're up there and she's standing there in front of you, the words will come."

"How can you be so sure?" Barry says, leaning up against the wall next to Oliver's dressing room. He slides the curtain down as he walks out into the open. He turns around to look at Barry.

He smirks. "Because I'm very rarely wrong."

"Damn." Barry says through a breath, staring Oliver up and down. He can't help but allow a smile to creep on his face.

"What?" Oliver asks, bringing his attention to Barry.

Barry stumbles on his words. "You look great."

Oliver laughs nervously. "You too, my friend."

The two stare at each other longingly. Both of their lips curve into grins. They look into the others eyes as if they were in desperation. What they both wanted stood right in front of them yet they believed that they couldn't have it.

"What are we doing, Ollie?" Barry said as he brought he attention to the ground below him.

"What's best for the both of us." Oliver says solemnly.

"Yeah." Barry says, pursing his lips together. "Does you tux fit?"

Oliver tugs on the loose part of his jacket. He checks himself in the mirrors ahead of him. "Fits fine."

He walks back into the dressing room, not saying another word to Barry. It killed his soul, seeing Barry in a tux for his wedding day, and hearing him talk about what he'd say to Iris before handing the rest of his life over to her. Every fiber of his being wanted to beg Barry to come back to Star City with him and they could start building towards a life together.

But they couldn't.

Not only was Barry engaged and to be married, they both led lives that they couldn't just leave. Oliver ran a multimillion dollar company. Barry was a trusted CSI in Central City's police force. Star City needed the Green Arrow, even though he had been taking more shots of alcohol than shots at criminals lately. Central City needed The Flash.

On top of it all, Oliver felt as if he did not deserve Barry. Or anyone for that matter. Both Laurel and Felicity were people he loved and cherished, yet he managed to push them away and hurt them in ways unimaginable. Despite the positive change of course in their relationship as of more recently, he still regretted how he hurt Laurel. How he breached her trust. How he made her feel as if she wasn't enough.

He couldn't put himself at risk to do the same to Barry. That smile, that goddamn smile, was something Oliver could not bear to imagine taking from Barry. He cherished their relationship more than anything. He couldn't lose Barry. If he were to become the man of his life, he felt as if he would just hurt him and push him out of his life.