The two boys, now cosy on the sofa under Newt's blanket, sat in silence staring at the flames dancing upon the logs. The fire crackled quietly as the yellow flames joined hands with the orange ones.
"If you don't mind me asking," spoke Newt in an apprehensive tone which compelled Alexander to look at him. "what's your story for wanting to feel nothing?"
Alexander shuffled slightly, one reason to become more comfortable and to face Newt and the other due to discomfort in this subject. Newt, not completely great at reading human body language, didn't notice the discomfort in Alexander.
"It's a bit of a long story really," Alexander explained. Newt only looked at him as if to carry on. Alexander sighed while thinking what to say, or even where to start.
"My family is a pure bloodline of Witches and Wizards, and due to our name's heritage we have to be perfect. This means perfect personalities, perfect appearances, perfect grades and a perfect life. And compared to everyone else in my family I'm, well, kind of the black swan of the family if you get what I mean?" Alexander spoke in a sort of downhearted tone.
Newt nodded understanding what he was trying to say. "You're not the only black swan." He chuckled. Alexander looked down at his lap while a small smile graced his lips. He hadn't felt a genuine connection with someone for a long time so this was nice for him.
"My family," He carried on a but more comfortable with discussing it. "personality wise holds a select amount of traits. These traits later in life show their similarity in the houses they're put in. All Coldwells are placed within Gryffindor and Ravenclaw. All except me, I'm the first Hufflepuff Coldwell. And in theory it's great and all, like while at Hogwarts it's great but at home not so much."
Alexander paused while turning his head to the side, his smile no longer evident on his lips. "My parents aren't too great when change occurs so the idea that their youngest son is in Hufflepuff was a bit of a let down to them. That straight away put me down on the list of achievements of the family." He grimaced slightly.
Newt, still perplexed about the boy, sat in silence waiting to hear more.
"This whole idea of having to be a perfect child is quit tantalising really. If I don't get Outstandings in all my O.W.Ls I'm a failure by my family's view which is why I was out in the snow. My brain always has cogs rotating and thinking up new things or pondering on something unimportant and irrelevant but in the snow it all freezes. My mind stops and goes silent and the thoughts leave me alone." He smiles at the idea of relief.
"And I want my brain to be silent more and more as time passes. So sitting out in the cold, in the snow just happens now. Normally it would just be sitting by the Lake that helps but the snow makes it all go away. All the feelings of being a disappointment to my family, the idea of always being the odd one out where ever I am and the pressure of everyone's expectations just melts away. I can be free and fine in the freezing cold." He looks at Newt who wears a sad smile as he comprehends what is said.
"The only downside of sitting out there is susceptibility to illness, is it not?" Newt questions in a quiet voice.
Alexander nods at Newt's question. "Yeah," he sighs while scratching the back of his neck. "My immune system has never been great so I'm pretty good at catching most things to be honest."
Newt, wide eyed, looks straight at Alexander as his brain pieces everything together. Alexander, not noticing Newt's look, just swings his feet as they hang close to the floor. He felt comfortable around Newt to tell him everything, and maybe he will say everything.
Newt's mind clicked and turned at Alexander's comment. Once all the cogs sat in place his mind was as clear as day. The boy, he met, did what he needed to do with no concern for his health, he's not reckless just too pressured to deal with the real world.
YOU ARE READING
The Tales of Newt Scamander - PAUSED
Fanfiction*Writing is Paused* Newt Scamander x Male Reader During Newt's years at Hogwarts there was one students he had always failed to notice. Neither were of a social type but even so Newt was very surprised when a fellow Hufflepuff sat alone out in the s...