Apartment 5C

two.

"Yes, definitely the red top."

Mikey and I were currently face-timing before her big date. I was helping her decide on an outfit, and I have been for the past hour and a half.

"Okay now, what about shoes? I have-" the screen freezes in the middle of Mikey's sentence and Jace's name flashes across my screen.

For some reason this made my stomach flutter with nerves. I haven't talked to Jace in probably about a week now, besides the occasional check-in text with one another.

"Mikey, I have to go. Jace is calling." I nervously say.

"Wait-what about shoes?"

"Just go with the black booties. You can't go wrong with those." I smile and wish her a good luck before hanging up and answering Jace's phone call.

"Hey." I try to hide the nerves in my voice and put up a cool front. The line stays silent for a few seconds and I pull the phone away to make sure he was still on the line. "Hello-"

"Lana." Jace cuts me off with his voice. He sounded just as weird as I did.

"That's my name." I chuckle.

This was way more awkward than it should be.

"Can I come over? Is your mom out?" It was like he was walking on eggshells with the way he spoke. I couldn't blame him though. I've been short fused these past few months.

"Of course. And yea she's out, where else would she be." I scoff at the thought of my mother.

My mom has been MIA ever since Jasper's death. I couldn't blame her for her mourning though. I mean she was never really around to begin with. Jasper and I just raised ourselves. That's probably what made us so close, even more close than your typical twins would be. My mom would work during the day and then go out at night. Jasper and I grew up on microwave dinners and craigslist babysitters.

After losing Jasper my mom quit her job and began to make going out at night an all day event. I haven't seen her in about 2 days. All I know is she's with some guy she met at a bar.

"I'll be there in five." My boyfriends soothing voice breaks me of my thoughts; I almost forgot he was on the phone. "And Lana?"

"Yea?"

"I love you." His voice seems to be cracking.

"I love you too. Drive safe." I quickly mumble before hanging up.

Love.

L-o-v-e.

Such an odd concept. Something everyone is capable of. Growing up I never thought love was real. I know you can love another person. I love my friends and family, but being in love with someone? Now that's where things got confusing for me.

I truly believe you can not be in love with someone for the rest of your life. Seeing my dad just up and leave when I was 5 was my main reasoning for this theory. Did I love Jace? Of course. But was I in love with Jace? I honestly don't know anymore.

Maybe I just haven't found the right person yet... or maybe being in love is just a made up concept that people like to believe to bring themselves comfort in life.

_

The sound of the doorbell ringing startles me as I finish getting dressed. I quickly pull over a gray hoodie and pair it with some black yoga shorts.

My panda socks make a static noise as I drag them across the wooden floor. My heart was pounding at what seemed like 200 beats a minute. I haven't seen Jace in person since the funeral. The last thing I said to him was that I needed space and time to mourn. I didn't want to bring him down with me during my state of depression.