It it all started with the fruit loops

Daddy Issues

"So, um I don't know how to put this Zelda. My dad lost his job, and now he has to live with us and Felipe." "Okay, I guess." Says Zelda. "Yay! Grandpa's coming." "No Felipe, grandpa doesn't jerk off." Later, there's a knock on the door. "FBI open up!" In a matter of seconds, Mr. Clean comes bursting through the door. "Dad!" "Wait a second, Mr Clean is your dad!" "Yay my grandpa is Mr. Clean!" "Well who's this hottie?" Says Mr. Clean. "That's my wife, Zelda." "No, the 3 year old." "That's Felipe." "Hey there Felipe. Anyways, you can call me Fredrick."

After 3 weeks, Jim and Zelda are getting tired of Fred just sitting around on his ass eating Cheetos and drinking Mountain Dew. Felipe on the other hand, is loving his visit. Zelda looks in the corner, and sees a pile of shit. "Felipe, did you shit in the corner?" "No Mommy, grandpa shit in the corner." "Why the hell would he do that?" "Because he's different." When Jim sees Fredrick going through his box of dicks, he has had enough. "Okay dad! You need to move out!" Fredrick  then goes into the bathroom with the toaster. "I'm gonna invent breakfast in bath!" He jumps in the bathtub but electrocutes himself. 

So here's a note from the author:

So in all seriousness, let's take a minute to mourn for the real life Mr. Clean, who died of pneumonia in 2008. Also, I probably should have said this earlier, but you probably shouldn't have read it if your sensitive to swearing, sexual things, and dumb shit. 

Anyways, I dedicate this book to Zelda Schultz 

So anyways I'm gonna wrap this shit up now. But I'm not gonna write the end. Because if you can't realize that it's the end, I will personally escort you to the nearest mental hospital. So instead of saying the end, I'll just put a picture of a banana dick.