Monsters of the Week

Felovenator anthrocephalus, a new Holocene feliformid from the Old Man River

(originally published as "Felovenator anthrocephalus, a new Holocene feliformid from the middle Old Man River, Alberta, Canada")

The morning was going... ok for Phoebe. It could be better, like if there was actual work to do, but even sitting at a desk waiting for someone to call in a question about an animal, even if that animal was dead most of the time, beat the crap out of shifting frighteningly collapsible columns of boxes around in the basement of a Toronto bookstore, or patiently listening to enraged parents insistent that their child was allergic to "crunchy", and she should have highlighted that when explaining the specials, which were both things that Phoebe was very glad to not have to do any more thanks to this job. The opportunity to do real science, and for the most part to not have to deal with wackos, almost made up for the fact that it was in Middle of Nowhere, Alberta, and that the pay wasn't any better than could be expected from a desk with the sign "Assistant Field Research Intern" on it. At least it was a paid position, and at least the "field" part wasn't a total lie all of the time.

Lewis stuck his head around the doorframe. "Hey, Phoebe, do you have anything committed for today?"

She looked up. "No, not unless something comes in. What is it?"

"Something came in. Rancher found a possible fossil weathering out on his spread south of Bob Creek. Can you go up and take a look at the site?" Like now, this was field work.

Phoebe stood up. "Sure. I'll grab a couple tarps and take the truck; do you have the address or a map marking or something?" Lewis handed her the grocery receipt he'd taken the call on; it had some basic directions off the Cowboy Trail highway, which was probably as good as it was going to get. She could get out there, and at the least be away from her desk for a few hours, even if all she would get to do on this site was stake down a couple tarps and call in an actual field team from Dinosaur Provincial Park. It was something. Phoebe took the keys for the office truck down from the key board by the door, and went to go grab some tarps from the gear piles in the back of the general storage area that, by virtue of having her desk parked in it, was allegedly her office.

Phoebe would have liked to be able to assert that her office was in the front seat of the truck, but for the most part, things didn't work out that way, and most days she answered a question or two from her office in the storage room while Lewis used the truck for vital science tasks like "go drop off the mail" or "go get Tim's and spend like 45 minutes talking with Bob and Ray from the Canadian Tire", so she made sure to savor it when she actually did get a chance to go out into the field, even on a case like this where she "got" to go because nobody else in the office wanted to go drive even further into the Middle of Nowhere and then hike up into the mountains to stake down some tarps. Fossils did not come delivered into museums articulated and mounted and understood: every new discovery started out in the dirt somewhere, and as long as somebody was going to have to do the hard work to start that process, Phoebe figured she might as well get herself in on the job. Lewis' directions were pretty clear on this one, and it helped that there was next to nothing out here: it was hard to miss a turn if there weren't any, or find the wrong ranch when there wasn't another for miles in any direction. She bounced up through a wash coming off the fire road, and came up on a guy standing next to an ATV, chaps over his jeans like he'd come straight from the Stampede parade. Apparently this was still work clothes out here. She stopped the truck and bailed out.

"Hey, I'm Phoebe Labrecque from Alberta Tourism, Parks, and Recreation; Lewis said you had some bones coming out of a slide?"

The cowboy nodded and held out a hand to shake. "Scott Janko. It's not too far from here, but the ground'd be too rough for your truck. Want a ride up?"