10 years

Twin talk

Luci ran after his twin, he didn't want her to stay mad at him. It always felt like he was always begging for her forgiveness. Even though there was nothing to beg for, she always forgave him even before he finished his hurtful words. As he got to the shared bedroom, the door was open to show Heaven sitting alone, hugging her pillow and waiting for Luci.  

"I'm sorry." He said walking into the room. 

"I don't know why your apologies. You never mean what you say." She replied. Luci signed and sat next to Heaven. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and he pulled her into his side. They stayed quiet for a while. Not an unconformable quiet but a  calming quiet. One that only twins can get, where the thousands of words can be said in a few minutes of quiet. 

"You know, you need to keep that anger in cheek. Gabe and Mike don't understand what you are trying to say when you get angry. You need to use words not fists."

"How am I supposed to do that when they don't understand me ?" He asked getting mad. 

"I'm not going to be here to hold your hand until you learn to figure it out."

"I know, it's just hard because voicing my emotions means that I'm weak. And if I'm weak then others will take me for granted. I always need to be on top of my game, never show that anything is wrong." He rants on and on. Heaven looks at Luci like he is crazy and before he could say any more she hit him upside the head.

"Would you shut up for once and stop being so dramatic? Gosh, I'm starting to think that you should be in the plays instead of Gabe. " 

Luci blushed and looked down. "Too much?"

"You think? I love you Luci and no one I mean no one thinks you are weak and helpless. But it is so important that you open up, tell Mike and Gabe how you think, feel, and why you do the things you do. Because if you don't then you and Mike are going to keep fights. It is only going to get worse." She really didn't want to leave her family with so many problems, she knows that it would get worse before it got better. She hoped that she could fix some if not all the family problems.   

"Why do you have so much insight on life, happiness, and the world?"

Heaven slowly looked down at the ground. "Because I will not live passed our 16th birthday. So I had to grow up fast to help you, three idiots, so you all can learn how to live without me being there to stop any and all fights."She had started to tear up, Luci noticed at the sound of a sniffle. His head instantly shot over to his twin sister. 

"Heaven, please don't cry, I hate to see you cry." Luci finally showed emotions the that he only reserved for his sister. He pulled her into a hug and watched to door to make sure that his other siblings were not watching them.

"Stop watching the door stupid, they know not to follow us when we have another twin talk."

"I know that. I just don't want them to know how much your sickness is so hard for me to deal with." Luci started to cry all his frustrations that he never gets show outward only in few and far in between (and fights). So when he does let it all out it hurts him so much. 

"I never thought that I would have to live without you. It hurts so much to even think about the rest of my life with my twin by my side. And knowing that I have to watch you die over the course of the year." He was crying so hard that it started to hurt his chest, he closed his eyes and tried to take a calming breath and he let her go. 

"Take a deep breath, and calm down, we have to go to school soon. So go wash your face and get presentable for your adoring public." She tried to make Luci laugh because she just wanted him to stop crying. 

Luci laughed waterily, "Sometimes I really hate you." He bumped her shoulder to show her that he is no longer sad.

"Awww...I love you too." She smiled one of her stunning smiles that make everything feel okay just for a little while. 

As the twins talked and had a very emotional moment, Gabe had gone upstairs in anger. He stopped just before their door to collect himself. He had one hand on the wall and another on his heart to help calm it down, as he was counting down the twins conversation broke through his thought. He laid his back against the wall, he knew that he should have walked away but it was his only way to figure out what was wrong with Luci. He loved his family so much and he hates conflict so much more. He wished that fix it all, but it all seemed to root around Heaven's sickness. 

As he listened his anger turned to understand then to sadness. Which resulted in silent tears. He had just started to calm himself down when he had heard one of the twins moving closer to the door. He did not want to be caught listening into their conversation, he went back downstairs to what for his family to be ready for school.