Mach: where do you wanna get healthy snack, Albert?
Albert, scoffing: I want chipotle.
Mach, screaming I said a hEALTHY SNACK ALBERT-
Goz: so yeah he broke up with me
Caroline, in morgenne's lap: why are you looking up?
Goz: I need to cry, but foundation was 48 dOLLARS-
Emmett, climbing into a drier: I am disgusted, I am revolted, I devote my entire life to our lord and savior Jesus Christ and this is the thanks I get?
Rust: are you flirting with me?
Somatikos: have been for the last two years but thanks for noticing!
Forests: we did it babe, you're gonna be a father!
Emmett: babe, I'm reading Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban - what do you want?
Mach: welcome to Taco Bell what can I get you
Albert: I wanna fuckin die
Mach: same
Caroline, on the phone with Albert: I think I'm having a midlife crisis
Albert: w- why?
Caroline: because it's two am and I just made so many lemon bars that there's no room on my counter
Rust: yeah, sex is cool
Rust: (lifts somatikos's hoodie above his head)
Rust: but have you ever seen your roommate's abs and realized you were gay
Somatikos: don't you love it when your brain releases a bunch of endorphins
Mach, sleep deprived: why would my brain release a bunch of dolphins
Rust: ccant relate
Somatikos: last Christmas, I gave you my heart
Rust: but the very next day, you said you were gay
Somatikos: (holding back laughter) this year, to save me from tears
Rust, yelling: I'LL GIVE IT TO PAPI CHULO
Somatikos: (on the floor, D Y IN G)
Someone: aren't you and Jack related?
Emmett: yall year summ?????
Mach: remember one time, I like you?
Alakazard: no?
Mach: good cause. NEVER HAPPEN
Alakazard, softly: aw
Mach: ah hA. a HO
Somatikos: and this is my roommate, Rust
Somatikos's entire family: are you sure about that
Adam: alright campers, we're gonna play the name game! You go first.
Jack: hi, my name's chakaOOFka and my dad knows god.
Goz: skeletons aren't scary. There's one inside you
Albert, screaming: not meant to exit the M E A T
Someone: what's your gender?
Noli: doom
Someone: no, I mean biological
Noli: terror
Someone: no, what's in your pants?
Noli: D E A T H A N D D E S T R U C T I O N
Morgenne: I really can't stay!~
Somatikos: but baby, it's cold outside.
Morgenne: I've gotta go away~
Somatikos: I'm gay and you'll die outside!
Caroline: Storytime!
Caroline: everyone in this room was entirely straight.
Morgenne, Rust, Somatikos, noli, forests, Clinten, goz, and Albert, siting on the floor:
Caroline: April fools.
Somatikos, yelling: FAKE NEWS!
Rust: bro I had a dream we fucked
Somatikos: don't worry bro it's just a dream
Rust: ha, gay I wouldn't fuck you
Somatikos, sadly: you wouldn't?
Rust, softly: I mean unless you wanted to
Rust, holding up him and somatikos's cat: stinky
Somatikos: no! Don't be mean!
Rust, swaying him back and forth in the air: stinky bastard man
Somatikos: no!!!!!!!!
Mach, not looking up from chopping veggies: naughty boy. Brat cat.
Somatikos, distraught: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Jake, a police officer: first name please?
Morgenne: ...frida.
Jake: okay, and last name?
Morgenne: Gomam.
Jake: you're Frida Gomam?
Morgenne: (drives off)
Jake: why do I always fall for this
Somatikos: so are you a big spoon or a little spoon?
Rust: I'm a knife.
Caroline: hey I'm lesbian
Clinten: I thought you were american
Newscaster: citizens were told to stay off the roads unless absolutely, positively necessary.
Albert: I wanted donuts
Caroline: (clinging onto goz's leg)
Emmett: let me guess, party last night?
Goz, with eyeliner sharp enough to kill your cheating husband and nails so bright they outshine the sun: how'd u know
Rust: I saw you hanging out with valleyofsaints yesterday
Albert: R- RUST ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK
rust, pulling out a nerf gun: I WONT HESITATE BITCH
Emmett: Arthur
Emmett, slightly louder: Arthur
Arthur, dead as shit:
Emmett, shocked; oh my fukin god he fuckin dead
Clinten: CAROLINE!
Clinten: is that a weed?
Caroline, giggling: no, this is a crayon-
Clinten, screaming: IM CALLING THE P O L I C E
Albert: hey how much money do you have
Goz; oh like 69 cents
Albert: ah, you know what that means
Goz, crying: I don't have enough money for chicken nugget
Goz: I am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand
Albert, throwing himself onto the sand: posideon quivers before him!
Goz: FUCK OFF
Chuck_Lloyd: I should've left you on that street corner where you were standing
Albert, mockingly: butcha diDNT
Rust: do you ever feel a tear go down ur face when ur laying down and thing damn I'm sad but not that sad
Somatikos, softly: babe r u ok
Caroline, driving; Spotify needs to stop giving me ads for premium, I am POOR and in COLLEGE, I will suffer through these ads like a normal person!
Morgenne, choking on laughter in the passenger seat:
Albert; whatever it is, I didn't do it.
Jake: you always say that, but I never believe you.
Caroline: I am in a mood to make some bad life choices!
Clinten: please don't sound so excited about it.
Morgenne: everyone thinks I'm so well put together, truth is I haven't brushed my hair in a month
Noli: stop that. It's too early for you to be in a good mood.
Alakazard: it's 4:30 in the afternoon
Albert: so you want a burger or a hotdog
Somatikos: Rust
Albert: that wasn't a choice
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And if you want more active updates on the myth au follow @ weakspot on quotev.com
I'll make a twitter account eventually
