It's now 12:22am, I can't sleep. For some reason I'm up thinking about me dying like I always do, then I thought why wait till my 19th birthday. I can kill myself right now and no one would give two fucks, but I can't leave now my sister needs me. Even though we aren't talking to each other because of this big fight we got into, maybe I should check on her.
Signa💙: Heyyyy sissy! I'm sorry for everything, I miss you and I might be coming to see you soon
Alex🤩: Bitch. Now you wanna text me. IM SORRY TOOO I HOPE YOU COME AND SEE MEEEE
Signa💙: Lmao💀bitch you scared mee
Alex🤩: Lol how!?
Signa💙: Ion know but I'll try to come and see you
Alex🤩: Okkkk Read at 12:35am
I try to sleep but it just won't work, I get on Instagram and stalk peep. My phone screen freezes up so I keep tapping it until it glitches back to normal, I notice that I liked his picture. I panic and unlike it super fast but it didn't work, he texts me right after.
Peepy🐣💖: So you like my pic🥴
Angel girl signa🖤: Shut up it was a accident
Peepy🐣💖: Make me shut up babygirl
Angel girl signa🖤: I'll block you🙂
Peepy🐣💖: Don't say it just do it😈
Angel girl signa🖤: Ok then bitch. Your starting to piss me off
Peepy🐣💖: I didn't even do anything
Angel girl signa🖤: Ugh yes you did, your being so fucking annoying.
Peepy🐣💖: Am not!😤
Angel girl signa🖤: Yeth your so annoying! Just lemme sleepppp
Peepy🐣💖: Ugh I just wanna show you luhhhhh
Angel girl signa🖤: Lmao, now I know you lying
Peepy🐣💖: I do just wanna make you happy and show you luh
Angel girl signa🖤: Ugh gus chill, we both know that ain't true Read at 1:12am
All alone again, welp I got to force myself to sleep now. I post something else on Instagram since I usually dont post twice.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Signamae I hope they love me before it's too late and I leave this unhealthy and terrible planet :(
Alexisdead stop saying stuff like this sig, our family misses you and worries about you Signamae @Alexisdead fuck our "family" they can't accept the fact that I'm different and they will never understand anything I fucking say, tell them I don't miss them at all.
Jennynohenny stop saying this :(
User1 ugh you fake your depression Signamae @user1 I would never lie about something so serious
User12 kill yourself already stupid slut 'Signamae liked this comment!'
Signamae I'm working on killing myself right now, don't worry about it anymore.
Lilpeep stop saying stuff like this Signamae @lilpeep fuck you and everyone else who says this bullshit
I'm stupid bored and it's now 2am, I sit my phone down and squeeze my eyes closed. I'm such a bitch and it's sad because I'm just noticing it, I'm so rude to everyone. It's not ok how I just totally told peep off in the comments, I feel bad now. I see why most people want me dead I'm a horrible person I don't deserve to be alive I should be dead.
Wow damn, this hurts I'm actually feeling bad after all the horrible things I've done. My past is coming back to haunt me after all these years.
FLASH BACK (OOP SHISTER THIS IS HER PASTTTT)
"Alex stop being so stupid and annoying!" I yell at my little sister, she cries silently and I just watch her frustrated. "It's not my fucking fault mom doesn't want you anymore signa! Their kicking you out because your a lazy bum!" She yells at me "ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!!!! YOU CANT EVEN PASS SCHOOL BUT YET YOU STAY TALKING SHIT ABOUT ME!" I scream.
She now breaks down into tears and I just watch her with a smirk, she notices and tackles me to the ground. I kick her off of me and she grabs a knife holding it in her hands tightly, I see another knife on the floor and I pick it up. We just stare at each other for a while until she tries to stab me.
I jump out of the way and stab at her hitting what I thought was her, I hear a body hit the ground as I take the knife out. I notice that it's not her, it's my dad. My eyes tear up and I'm lost for words, Alex screams and calls my mom. I just sit there in silence crying "what have I done" I say to myself.
FLASH BACK OVER
All the memories that I thought I forgot and erased from my mind came flooding back, I put my head in my hands and cry for what felt like forever.
