The Air We Breathe || JUNGKOOK

Chapter 11

A couple more days have passed and ever since Jungkook and I have touched hands for the first time, we haven't been able to stop. We could make Jimin and Taehyung suit us up just for us to hold hands for another ten minutes.

It may seem silly to you, but Jungkook is all I have when it comes to love. Love? Wait, nevermind. It's too soon.

Currently, it is 12:32 am, and my head is resting upon the cold concrete of the roof of the hospital, my hair is scattered across the darkness and I feel as if I am floating as I look up to the stars above my head. They remind me of Jungkook and I. No, not the star crossed lovers thing, that is just way too cheesy for this story. Stars are beautiful things from a far. the brightest things in darkness. Although when up close, they are big balls of fire, waiting to burn out.

I turn my head to the side, eyes trailing down my outstretched arm to the hand that is connected to it. The man laying, within an arms length away from me, has his other arm resting against his chest as he takes gentle breaths. His raven hair resting messily against his face with his black mask pressed against his face, with his shining black eyes staring directly into mine.

"We shouldn't be holding hands without a supervisor Y/N, could be dangerous." Jungkook chuckles, making a joke about everytime Taehyung had to stay in a room while we held hands.

"I feel bad for Taehyung. I'm sure he doesn't want to stay in a room with us everytime we hold hands. We haven't even had time to let go since we found out we could." I smile, rubbing my gloved hand on top of his.

"Maybe one day I'll be able to hold you on this rooftop." Jungkook says looking back at the sky. I prop myself up on my elbows looking over to him. "You are holding me Jungkook." I say, referring to his hand wrapped around mine. He bites his lip and shakes his head. 

"No, I mean in my arms. I want to be able to grasp onto something, that won't be ripped from my grip the moment I get it." He says. I place my other hand on top of his, enclosing his hand inside mine as I bring it to my mask, kissing it. "I promise you, Jungkook. I won't ever leave you." I say staring into his eyes as he avoids mine suddenly. 

"I love it that you mean it doll. Sadly in our cases, you shouldn't make a promise you can't actually keep." He says. Those words.... The words that came out of his mouth. They were the truth.

But who knew how much words could sting ones heart. "Jungkook, don't say shit like that. It's not funny." I say removing my hand from his and tuck it under me.

"Doll, you know I didn't mean it like that. I just meant--" I hold up my hand to pause him. "I know what you meant. You don't have to repeat yourself." I say standing up, and fixing my sweater and my hair. I hear him groan as he stands up adjusting his grey hoodie before walking towards me.

"Doll, please don't be mad at me." He says, his voice muffled slightly from his mask. "I'm not, but we're supposed to be a team Jungkook. You can't say that around me. Not now, not ever." I say crossing my arms as he holds his arm out to me. The breeze, sending a chill down your spine ruffles his black hair as his eyes shimmer in the moonlight.

"I want to show you something Y/N." He says as I take his warm hand in mine. "If it is another picture of your 6 pack Jungkook I swear to god--" 

"No! No. Something else." He smiles, guiding me back to his hospital room.

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Jungkook lets me into his hospital room first then enters in after me, shutting the window behind him. "Some would consider this a scandal Y/N." Jungkook says behind me. I turn and raise an eyebrow. "How so?" I ask and he smiles. 

"Two sick lovers, sneaking around the hospital roofs at the dead of night just to be with each other." He says making his way to the un made hospital bed with bundles of blankets scattered. "I wouldn't exactly say it's a K-drama Jungkook." I snort and he rolls his eyes pointing to the corner of his room at a sleeping Taehyung curled up in a ball, his hair draped across his eyes as a small ball of drool falls from his mouth.

"He sure cares for you Jungkook, if he isn't willing to leave the room while you're asleep." I chuckle as Jungkook picks up his pillow retrieving something from inside of the case. I cross my arms and readjust my mask as he opens the leather bound book, flipping through pages before walking over to me until his 2 foot limit. "What is that?" I ask. He closes the journal and holds it out  to me. I stare at it before taking it from his gloved hand into mine. I flip through the white pages, seeing.....poems.... upon poems inside of this book. Page after page is just....poems.

I read some and find my hand crawling its way to my mouth as I read the words he put upon the pages. "Read the first page." He says and I turn to the front of the journal.

******I feel the world collapsing on top of me. Just wishing that it wouldn't try to crush what I dream to be. For the only thing I want from this cruel world, is for it only to be her and me.*******

My eyes start to well at the raw emotion in Jungkook's words, I look up to him, surprised that he is showing his sentimental side to someone he has only known for a couple months. Where in any other person, it would take years to develop this type of relationship. He smiles at his feet, slightly turning red, for I am reading his poems, his personal feelings that no one ever really wants to share. "I asked if you were a poet." I giggle handing him his journal back. He continued to blush, taking the book from my gloved hands, putting it back in his pillow case, throwing it back on his bed. "I said I was something like that. Poetry isn't my thing" He says sitting down on his bed.

 "When I was... younger. I felt free writing lyrics in notebooks. I felt the world was always against me. This diagnosis on my lugs and chest, not allowing me to say the words I want, when I want. My only option was to write them down, hoping one day I would get to make a song out of the empty words on the pages." He smiles sadly.

"You sing?" I ask, standing across from him. "I did. before I was dia--" He starts and I shush him. "Stop. Stop saying before you were diagnosed. Just answer my question." I say and he shakes his head laughing. 

"Yes. I do." he responds and I smile behind my mask. "But you're not hearing any right now Doll. That's for another time." He says standing up, and putting his hands on his pocket.

I look over to his clock, resting on the nightstand beside his bed. "Shoot. It's already 1:00. I should get back." I say scratching my head. He bites his lip and nods, his black bangs falling over his eyes and nods.

"I will see you tomorrow. I can't wait." He smiles, referring to the hospital dance that is tomorrow night. I feel red creep across my cheeks which, luckily was hidden with my mask. " I can't either." I respond heading towards his door. 

He grabs my hand before I leave, making me turn around to face him.

"Tomorrow night Doll. I will kiss you." He says, showing me his bunny smile, making my insides turn to mush with excitement. He kisses my hand as I leave his room trying to seclude my excitement without gushing with emotion.

Jungkook smiles watching me go as he walks over to Taehyung and slapping him a couple times on the face waking him up.

"Aiiish, Jungkookie what are you waking me up for?" Taehyung asks rubbing his forehead. 

"Hyung. I need you to help me with something." 

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To be continued...