ꜱᴇᴇꜱᴀᴡ ɢᴀᴍᴇ ~ ʏᴏᴏɴᴍɪɴ
"One of us has to come down for the other to rise up, that's just how this game works."
Best friends since preschool, boyfriends since middle school, toxic as of their current fourth year in high school. Their love and need fo...
The cold wind blew harshly against the frosty window, awakening Jimin from his thoughts. He had been thinking a lot lately, maybe a bit too much for his own liking. His brain kept over-analyzing little things, leaving him in a constant argumentative state with his own mind.
Class dismissed forty-eight minutes ago, the teacher allowing Jimin to stay behind. The school day was over, but something within himself couldn't be bothered to leave. He had made plans with Yoongi last night, but as the clock ticked away he realized too much time had gone by to be fashionably late.
Jimin sighed, standing up from his desk so he could gather up all his belongings. The classroom has an orange hue to it, feeling barren even though it's been in use for over fifty years. A lot of things have felt like that to Jimin lately, but he couldn't pinpoint what was making it that way,
or who.
Last night had been on his mind. The feeling of Yoongi's breath across his neck, warm skin and the weight of a body pressed above his own. The boy he loves made love to him, so why does it make his stomach turn? He finds Yoongi beautiful and so incredibly attractive, it was nothing to do with him.
A part of Jimin was screaming something he had been mulling on for a while; asexuality.
Closing the door behind him, he walked down the eerily quiet hallway. Asexuality is not something he wanted to be his reality, it made him feel useless to his lover and too different to compare to others. People were designed for sex, that's why everyone looks the way they do. It was terrifying to Jimin, living in his own perfect world, that he may be different.
Being gay was never a problem, he lived in an accepting town with two lesbian mothers. Somehow being asexual, that was scary. It shouldn't matter, after all, it's just sex. To Jimin, being different in that way did matter and it hurt him.
The biggest part of the fear stems from not wanting to lose his boyfriend. It's not healthy to fear losing your partner from a lack of sex, but that's not how Jimin thought of it. Jimin was seeing Yoongi as something far greater than what he is. He saw him on such a high pedestal, believing that Yoongi would leave if not treated like Jimin believes he should be.
Jimin has always just sucked it up. For three years he has held back his feelings four times a week and more, just so his lover could be happy.
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