Gone Without A Trace

Christmas Without You

It's been months since my little girl ran away...I miss her so much having not heard her voice or seen her face in months was driving me crazy

Questions millions of them ran through my mind is she safe is she in the warm is she scared

Is she alive?

I turn over after yet another sleepless night to see it's early hours of Christmas Day

I hadn't even noticed...

My phone starts buzzing with people sending me well wishes but I ignore every single one of them I didn't want to talk to anybody let alone wish them a Merry Christmas

I didn't even care about what she did all I wanted was to hold her right now

That would be the best Christmas present of them all

TRACYS POV

Christmas on the streets is extremely underwhelming I thought I could survive but it was proving to be more difficult than I thought

I'd resorted to begging and in doing so had made a decent amount...enough to get a hot drink anyway...part of me wanted to get a new mobile so I could ring Cam

No! She doesn't want me anymore. I have to face up to that.

I head over to a little food and drink hut which thankfully was open and order a hot chocolate and a panini only to find I'm 40P short

'That'll be £6.45 please' the server says

I look at her I had never stolen in my life

But I needed this...I'd gone so long without

I give her a look as if to apologise, picking up my food and drink I run out the door as fast as I can

'She hasn't paid!' The server shouts

Someone starts running after me and I start to panic as I see an alley I dive down it holding in the tears enough for them to run straight past me

'I need you mum' I whisper sinking to the ground, my head in my hands I shakily grip the cup and take a sip, it's so warm and soothes me instantly

I take a bite of the panini and all sorts of flavours hit me at once its so good it feels like I'm imagining it, I've been without food for so long, apart from scraps here and there

I can do this...can't I?

CAMS POV

I approach the door and look up, the place has changed a lot since Tracy was here

I knock the door and a little girl opens it

'Hello, who are you?' She says with a smile

'I'm a friend of mikes' I say truthfully

'MIKE!' She shouts before inviting me in I take a look around it's definitely changed

'Tee what have I told you about answering the door? Oh hi Cam how can I help you?' He says smiling

'Hi mike, would you mind if I speak to you a minute? In private?' I say, noticing the kids peering round the door I smile and they smile back

'What's up?' He says smiling

I cave in I can't help it

'Oh of course...how stupid I am' he says giving me a hug

'It's been months. Mike. She's not coming home is she?' I say

He stays silent probably not knowing what to say, I turn to leave but he stops me

'Why don't you spend Christmas with us? I'd hate for you to spend it alone' he says

'I'd like that' I say smiling

'Good cuz Christmas dinner is calling' he says smiling I follow him into the kitchen and we all sit down at the table

The kids all start pulling crackers and the sound of laughter brings tears to my eyes

I miss my Tracy. So much...

'Here you are' mike says bringing over a plate

'Thanks' I say smiling

As we all sit and enjoy Christmas dinner I feel so much happier than I would've before

Eventually the day draws to a close and I stand up to leave

'Thanks for today Mike' I say smiling

'It's okay' he says giving me a hug

We pull away and within seconds I find myself leaning in for a kiss

To my surprise he reciprocates before pulling me back gently, looking horrified to say the least

'Cam, I know you miss Tracy but this isn't a way to cope with it' he says

'I know...I'm sorry' I say before running out

'Cam wait!' I hear mike say behind me but I don't stop running

Where are you Tracy.

Come home.

TRACYS POV

It's starting to get dark as I watch the snow fall and the moon rise, trying to stop shivering, I'd found a new doorway and made enough money to buy a sleeping bag and a jumper from the charity shop, which makes me feel a little better

I settle down for the night watching the moon glow brighter, scaring off my fear of the dark

'Merry Christmas Mum' I whisper before falling into a deep sleep

CAMS POV

I arrive back home, hoping Christmas Day spirits would help it feel less empty

It doesn't.

I decide to head to bed having had enough now, kissing mike was I mad?

Clearly.

I settle down for the night, watching the stars and the gentle snowfall it looks like a fairytale

'Merry Christmas Tracy' I whisper before closing my eyes and falling into a deep sleep