Heads and Bodies

- Apple a day-

-Angela-
      
"Addiction is a symptom of not growing"

C. C. DeVille

The pain that had consumed my whole body had begun to bring me back to consciousness, the ringing undeniable within my ears began to intensify as I allowed myself to open my eyes, revealing an inverted reality. My body hung freely, bound merely by the fabric of my seatbelt, I seethed in pain as I brought my arm across my torso to remove my harness, I turned my head slightly, expecting pain that had not yet been delivered, my left eye felt foreign and clouded in vision, yet I could sense the absence of Grace's body beside my own
" G.. Grace?" My voice came through as rough and scratchy despite my effort to call out to her  " Grace?" I was only able to manage a whisper, despite my best effort to evoke a response, before I was able to call out again, the sound of a car screeching to a holt came from nearby, " holy fuck.. Roger call an ambulance" my vision swirled at the adrenaline " anyone?" I finely reached to the buckle of the seatbelt and pressed the button, causing my whole weight to land on the roof of the car, sending a sharp pain up the left side of my spine, ignoring the sharp ache that exuded from the point of impact, I pulled myself out of the cars window that must of been broken in the crash, latching on the the crevasses of the road underneath me I was able to fully removed myself from the wreck twisting myself to face the accident, it wasn't until I saw the lifeless body laying upon the road in front of me that a scream left my lungs.

" Ms Johnson?" An unfamiliar yet calm voice brought me towards the septic light hanging about my body, I looked around me, not fully comprehending that I was not on the road where I last recall being, a younger lady stood beside my bed, her plain green scrubs confirming that she was a medical professional, " Grace?.. where is she?" I attempted to reach my hand towards the nurse, but was restricted by a pair of tight handcuffs attached to the metal bar of the bed,
My eyes widened with surprise, " it's okay Ms Johnson, it's for your own safety and those around you, I'm Shelley" I stared at her in disbelief, frantically attempting to rip my hand away from the base of the bed " where the fuck am I?" The sting of my profanity evidently triggers a reaction from Shelley
" you have been relocated to St John's Ward"
My heart skipped a beat, as the blood beneath my skin seemed to boil, St John's Ward..
" Rehab".

" welcome to St. John's rehabilitation ward Ms Johnson.." an older man wanders into the room of which I had been detained in since I woke up from the accident, replacing the calmness of Shelley's company, his rough, black eyes reflect the acidic light that hung above the small claustrophobic confines of the room, his off white doctors coat hung loosely on his small figure " I'm Doctor Osbourne and I've been informed that you were part of an accident Ms Johnson, is that correct?"
" Yes" I replied regretfully
" you have been moved here, on the preface that you struggle with a narcotics addiction, is that also correct Ms Johnson?" He began to take erratic notes upon his wooden board before quickly looking upwards to meet my terrified gaze " I'm not an addic.."
" This is a place of God Ms Johnson, there is no reason to lie to him or yourself during your stay here" he interrupted, undoubtedly due to the fact he would of heard this same story an abundance of times
" Yes, I'm an addict"
" there you go.. admitting your sins is the first step to forgiveness" he placed his pen down, directing his full attention to me once more
" You will be here for quite some time Ms Johnson.. Do you believe in God?"
Admittedly I had never questioned any version of God or religion, I did not see myself as a Holy individual to say the least
" not really"
" well I'd begin to Ms Johnson".

hours passed before I had contact with another person, I was left to sit and recollect myself after the tragic event that unfolded, it was my fault that the car spun out, and what if Grace was hurt? I had been told I was not allowed to know the status of her condition until either herself or her family gave them permission to, apparently in an attempt to make my stay here less turbulent. The throbbing in my head had begun to pound, as my whole body was engulfed in sweat, both symptoms of withdrawals.

" Here is your lunch Ms Johnson" Shelley reappeared from behind the curtain sheltering me from the rest of the room, she held a small platter, filled with sugar free jelly, some chicken broth and carrot stick, I looked up to her in surprise.
" I know it doesn't seem that..appealing Ms Johnson, but it's to cleanse your body it'll help with the withdrawals" she reassured me as she placed the platter onto the small table, looking down towards me with a warm smile.
the feeling of  nausea spread across my body like wild fire, before I could control myself vomit began to pour from my mouth uncontrollably Shelley's wide eyes  met with my glassy ones " oh my, I'll get you a bucket.. and some new clothes" she quickly hurried out of the room leaving me embarrassed and alone.

" That didn't seem pleasant" a foreign voice came from behind the curtain, a male voice this time with a sharp English accent
" no fucking shit" I couldn't censor myself, my purest emotion seemed to leak from my heart
" I've been there, I'd love to say it gets better but that depends if you think physical pain out weighs the emotional pain"
" well.. thank you for that advice stranger"
" maybe I'll see you soon then"
And with that, his presence drifted away and out the double doors of my ward.