Don't Let Me Fall

Chapter 2: Shouting

"I'm going back Mum!" I exclaimed. She looked at me and sighed. "I'm not letting you leave. You're grieving. You need time" She looked at me, pitiful, almost waiting for me to snap. But I didn't. "Look Mum. He died because of me. It was my fault" I said muttering. I can't show weakness. Every time someone pities me, I despise it. They didn't understand. If only I had payed more attention when it happened, he'd be alive. I shouldn't be here. It should have been me. I can't bare the thought of reliving every second in my head, going over and over the moment he was gone. How his usually bubbly, bright green eyes let go of any light still in them. how his body dropped to the floor with a thud, and how I have to live on knowing I could've helped him. I could've helped.

"Look Mum. He died because of me. It was my fault." I muttered. She looked into my eyes with that hard 'mother stare' kids get when they haven't cleaned their room. I wasn't a kid; she couldn't scare me. "You are not going back. I can't have my son risk his life for something that happened months ago. I know you hate to hear this Jack, but he's gone. Cas is gone. It wasn't your fault. You can't blame yourself. Please, remember that." Again. Sympathy. "I don't want your sympathy!" I shouted and stormed out. She had no clue what she was talking about. Was she there? No. Leaving the house hastily, I stopped to think. Maybe I should've stayed, listened to her. She's my mother. As I turned around, I saw my mum stand behind me, sadness filling her eyes. I didn't want to see her like this. So I hugged her tightly, whispering in her ear, "I love you, I'm staying."

I wake up to shuffling in my room. First off, why am I sleeping on the couch? And I've got a splitting headache. Tylenol it is. Entering my room, I see the girl and I panic. Did we do something last night? Oh no. Wait... I search my memories from the previous night. I have to say, there's not much there. This girl, Amy, Ava, umm? Amira. Why was she here? In my flat, in my clothes. Oh! I saved her last night. Right. I should become a professional drunk dude! You know what, maybe not. "Can I leave yet?" Amira says with her arms folded and a pouty expression painted on her face. She looks cute. "What? I said you can stay here until you're back on your feet. Did I not?" I replied. As the cute little pout increases, I recognise this as anger. Should she go? No, what kind of 'guy with a conscience' would I be if I sent her back onto the streets. It's an ass move. "Sweetie, I want you to stay here until you get some money under your belt." I sigh. She looks as if she wants to hit me. But before she does, I duck out of the way and chuckle. "I'm not a little girl! Don't call me sweetie!" she shouts. As she goes to hit me again, I catch her fist. I look at her and her beauty radiates from her. I'd think she was beautiful if she didn't want to kill me. But there's no feelings here.

"Tylenol." I say. "Sorry what?" She looks at me confused. I answer her "There's Tylenol in the bottom drawer. Behind you, I can't reach. Amira's face settles as she grabs the bottle of pills and throws them at me, yelling "Think fast!" I grab the bottle quickly, and before she can even process how I did that, I take two and throw them onto the bed. "Very impressive-" She stops in her tracks, looking puzzled and I laugh. "Jack."

We both look at each other, and as awkward as we are, I manage to come up with the words "I'm taking you to see my sister." "Why?" She questions. "She'll take you shopping for new clothes, and whatever girls need. But a warning in advance, Nadya is the most hyper 16 year old you'll ever meet." Amira stares at me. "I don't want to" she says, with this new-found confidence. "You can't make." I laugh. "Would you like to stay in my clothes forever, dear?" I comment mockingly. She looks furiously into my icy eyes, but answers "Let's go."

As we enter my mother's house, I hear my younger sister exclaim excitedly "Mum! Jack's bringing his lady friend for us!" My face flushes a pink tone, but as I look at Amira next to me, she's even redder. Nadya comes bouncing out from the spotless kitchen and immediately runs to hug me. "I missed you so much!" She says. "Me too squirt" Amira hides awkwardly behind me, and seeing this, she shouts, "Look Mum! It's the girl" "There isn't anything in it. I met him yesterday" Amira tells Nadya, calming her down a little.

"It's not like we'd know dear, we never see Jackiepoo anymore" my mother says, coming down the stairs laughing. Everyone laughs at this comment except me. "Jackiepoo? Really Mum?" I say embarrassed. Looking at me and giggling, Amira says "I like it Jackiepoo." Thanks mum. Seriously? "Nadya? I was wondering if you'd take Amira here shopping? At the moment she only has my clothes to where and I'm sure my taste doesn't appeal to her." I say nervously, trying to change the subject. What if she doesn't agree? "Please? Consider it a favour for your big brother." Happily, Nadya bounces up and down and smiles widely. "Of course I will. Is that okay with you Amira?" All of us look at Amira, who is now showing her confident side. Cute. "Fine by me." She laughs, "Anything to get away from this guy." I role my eyes as both Nadya and this beautiful girl leave the house.

"I'm not that bad am I?" I ask, turning my attention to my mother. She laughs. "No you're worse!" Glaring her down subtly, she says "Do you like her?" "Yeah, she's alright, why?" I reply. My mum tells me off, saying "That's not what I meant and you know it." "No feelings there." I sigh. "I only met her last night. It's too early. "Don't deny your feelings son. I've not seen you so happy in years." As she finishes what she's saying, the radio speaks "And the fire at the Charleston Street Bar blazes on, men on duty surround the building as it is engulfed in flames. There's no sign of anyone else in the building, minus the bartender Ernie Green. We advise that anyone who knows of the men causing this terrible incident come forward as soon as-" "MY FLAT!" I cry and run out of the door, my mother quick on my tail.