It's been a while now and I still miss the way she said my name.
I didn't know my bones could ache forever for so long.
They say there's beauty in sadness but I don't think so ( at least not like this.)
When it's 3 a.m and alcohol is the only thing that helps me sleep.
They didn't warn me that heartache doesn't always have someone to blame. Sometimes it's no one's fault ( it's probably all mine).
I found her sweater the other day and it still smells like her and that spring we spent telling each other we'd be forever.
I didn't really think about how forever could end.
She used to call me beautiful and look at me with eyes that meant it. Now I just don't know how I'm supposed to hear that word from anyone else.
I'm caught somewhere between moving on and holding on and not knowing which one I can handle best.
I feel messy and uneasy and I don't understand how one person with pretty eyes can destroy an empire inside me by walking away.
Her lips tasted like air after rain and these days all I do is think about a the way they felt between my thighs.
My pillow isn't her and the song on the radio isn't ours.
I sit next to a girl in class but we can't talk for hours.
Where do I go when a lover and a friend becomes a memory and a dead end?
I saw her bye the escalators last week. I smiled at her and she looked the other way.
I felt my heart splinter all over again.
YOU ARE READING
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Poesíathis is the recipe of life said my mother as she held me in her arms as i wept think of those flowers you plant in the garden each year they will teach you that people too must wilt fall root rise in order to bloom - rupi kaur
