Not So Simple

Chapter Seventeen

"False alarm, guys. You won't be going into labor for a while yet."

Louis feels his whole body relax and he looks over at Harry, who is running a hand through his curls. Both of them had been so worried that it was time already; that their babies would be premature and...well. They had worried about a lot of things. Not just losing the babies, but health problems and having to stay in the hospital forever until the babies grew.

But now that they know Louis isn't giving birth for a while yet, Louis has a huge weight off of his shoulders. He squeezes Harry's hand in his and smiles, trying to talk to him without expressing any words. Harry squeezes back and the message is clear; thank God.

"Louis, I can't help but recognize that you're near your eighth month," Dr. Loren says, studying her charts carefully. "You were scheduled for an appointment in a week, but seeing how you're already here, do you want to just do the ultrasound now?"

They both nod a little too fast, but they're both so giddy to see their babies that they can't help it. Louis especially is excited to see them. He wants to see how much they've grown, how much they've progressed; all the changes they've made in these last couple of months. In his peripheral vision, he sees Harry bouncing up and down. He wonders if it's from nerves or excitement.

Louis lifts his shirt up for Dr. Loren, shivering as the cold gel is smothered on his stomach. He doesn't think he'll ever get used to that. Harry's hand strokes his hand as the picture comes on the screen, and Louis' breath gets caught in his throat, as it always does. The one baby, the boy, Louis is guessing, is still quite bigger than the girl. He's not huge, obviously, but he appears to be at least five pounds already. The little girl, on the other hand, is...Louis sighs, his heart hurting dreadfully in his chest. She's so small. She can't be any bigger than one or two pounds, and that's incredibly worrisome. What if she doesn't get any bigger? What if, what if, what if?

Dr. Loren stares at both of the babies for a while, jotting down notes and changes they've made, how much pounds they've put on. When she turns to look at Louis and Harry again, her face looks grim. "I don't...I don't know how to say this, you two. Your little girl, she..." She shakes her head, sighing. "She is extremely premature still. I was hoping she would grow from the last visit but she almost hasn't grown at all. Not only is her body not growing, but her internal structures aren't, either." It looks like Dr. Loren and Harry share a look of sorts, but Louis can't be sure. "What this means is that her lungs are...too tiny and underdeveloped. Her entire body is, but especially her lungs. If she's born without her lungs fully developed, I'm afraid-"

"Stop!" cries Louis, his hands going to his ears. "Please, I can't hear another word. I don't-I don't mean to be rude, but..."

Dr. Loren only gives him a sympathetic smile and pats his shoulder. "I understand, Louis. I'll leave you two alone for a while. Your due date looks like it could be around the end of August, so keep an eye out and be prepared, alright?"

Once again, they both nod, and then Dr. Loren walks out of the room.

Louis looks over at Harry, his eyes wide and tearful, and he all but crushes Harry into a hug. He needs to know that he's here, that he's going through this too; that they're going through this together, that no matter what, they'll always be together.

"I love you so much, Harry," he mutters from Harry's neck. "You've been-you've been so extraordinary through all of this and...and I need to know that you're going to stay here for me. Even if our little girl isn't big enough, if she can't breathe properly and-" He chokes off, letting out a sob. "I just need to know that you're going to stay by my side and raise our son, even if he doesn't have a sister."