The Invisible

My Special Place

Thank god I'm home what a dreadful day at school but nothing Mum needs to know!

"I'm going out Mum" I call as I walk out the door.

So where am I going? Well to my very special place which I only go to when I need to think, where I can say what I want and no one will hear me because I'm all alone and no one can ever judge me, it's seriously really great!

After a good half hour walk I arrive at the destination, it's a huge oak tree, beautiful really! I sit at the bottom and write in my diary but this diary isn't a normal diary...you see I only use this diary when I'm feeling down and today after everything is one of those days. I also brought a little juice box for myself as I usually sit here for a good two hours!

As I'm sitting here a big beautiful brown butterfly flies up to me and lands on my shoe, as I sit admiring it the only thing I can think about is how ugly I am compared to this beautiful butterfly which looks so proud of itself. After five minutes of admiring it just flutters off as if it's suddenly bored of me, which reminds me of Abigail and Teresa. Oh how dare they just abandon me like that leaving me stranded and hopeless at school.

It's getting late now! Almost 7.00pm! Oh jeez! I pack up my things and rush home as I'm late for dinner although tonight I'm not that hungry, I just don't want to eat. I quickly arrive home and rush myself upstairs. Out of sight out of mind.

"Charley your dinner is here" my mum calls from the bottom of the stairs.

"I'm not hungry, I'll eat it later" I call back feeling like I'm doing the right thing.

I get my pyjamas on and climb into my bed it is getting quite late but as I lay there scrolling through Twitter I suddenly start to realise I'm no longer looking at happy things, all my tweets and re-tweets are all really sad! Whilst later that night these tweets become actions instead of things I just thought.

Roughly 1am these actions became true I sat up crying about school. Tonight changed my life because I reached for a blade that I kept in my room which originally was incase of an intruder so I could threaten him. Tonight I used it for the very first time but I didn't use it on someone else, only on myself. My pain began to rush away as the blood appeared on my arm. I only done several times before I stopped.

Suddenly I wondered what I was doing and why I was cutting myself but then I remembered all the pain I had kept inside and all I was doing was letting it out.