People Like Us (Boy x Boy)

Kiss and Tell

Xavier's POV

"Okay, okay, let me think!" I pursed my lips and took a swig of Mike's Hard Lemonade. Brendan and I were in the middle of playing questions in which we took turns asking each other deep, dirty, and downright embarrasing questions. "Okay, so there was this one time that Skylar and I went to visit his grandparents in Oakland. It was around ten or so and we snuck out of the house while they were sleeping. We'd gotten fake ID's made earlier that week and we wanted to test them. So we went to this, uh," I glanced at Brendan, "this gay bar."

Rather than looking disgusted, Brendan's expression turned inquisitive as if he were thinking hard about something. Either way, it gave me the courage I needed to continue.

"So we get there and we go in. Skylar marches up to the counter like he owns the place and slides his ID onto the counter. He asks for a whiskey neat and the bartender stares at him like he's committed some serious crime but gets him his drink. Skylar nudges me and I slide my card across the counter and ask for the same. Bartender gives me the drink. I down it all in one go and immediately start coughing my guts up! Skylar is laughing his ass off and the bartender looks over at us and asks, 'how old are you, really?'"

Brendan chuckles. "You really had him fooled."

I stuck my tongue out at him. "So Skylar tells him that I just turned twenty one and we were celebrating with my first drink. It's obvious the bartender doesn't believe us, but he keeps serving us drinks and we get well and truly drunk. I remember we started dancing and these other couples dance with us and somehow we're in a cab making out and then we are in his grandparents house and...and yeah."

I look down at my drink, unable to look at him.

"What happened?"

"We, uh, we had sex for the first time," I finished.

Brendan stilled. He cleared his throat and looked away, uncomfortable. "I see," he said, running his hand through his hair. I took another swig of my drink, finishing the bottle while Brendan took a sip.

"What's it like?" he asked suddenly.

I looked up at him in surprise. "What's what like?"

"Y-you know, being...gay."

I blinked. "Did you really just ask me that?"

To my surprise, Brendan let out a bark of laughter and shook his head. "I guess that was a pretty stupid question, wasn't it?"

"You think?"

Brendan only chuckled. "You know what I meant."

I placed the empty bottle on its side beside me and began spinning it in circles. "What's it like being straight?" I asked instead.

Brendan looked thoughtful for a moment before shrugging. "Fair enough."

I leaned back against the couch and looked at him. "Brendan, being gay...it's not like anything. It's not any more superior or inferior than any other sexuality. It just...is."

Brendan finished his bottle and placed it between us, spinning it. "It's just...i've been thinking about a lot of things lately and I'm having a hard time sorting things out."

"Is that...one of the things you need to sort out?"

Brendan shrugged. "No. I just wondered what it was like. I was trying to put myself in your shoes."

"Brendan, I can't tell you what being gay is like."

For some unknown reason, my heart began to race and I felt as if I were on a rollercoaster; my stomach felt on the verge of a plunge. I looked down at his hands. His long and calloused fingers continued to spin the bottle until they suddenly let go. The bottle spun on its own and came to a slow stop until its neck pointed in my direction. I looked up at Brendan and met his eyes, suddenly unable to breathe.

"Show me," he said.

***

Skylar's POV

Xavier was pissing me off. He hadn't answered my texts and he'd ignored my calls. I'd driven by his house earlier but he wasn't home. Drumming my fingers against my stomach, I placed my headphones on and cranked up the music. I bet he was with Brendan. Though he hadn't said anything, I knew that they were hanging out again.

Oh, stupid, stupid, Xavier. Why can't you see that he's just going to use you and abuse you again? I just wanted to knock some sense into him. I mean, I was there for him. I am there for him. Yet, he chose Brendan over me. I'd always wondered if it may come to that some day. If Brendan wanted to reconcile, truly reconcile, would Xavier ditch me for him? I know it's stupid of me to think that way but I can't help it. He was Xavier's first love even though he'd shattered his heart.

My stomach churned. Just thinking about the two of them together made me feel sick. My thoughts flashed to the moment I caught Brendan on top of him. Even though it might have been innocent enough, I couldn't help the sting of jealousy that had shot through me. I'd wanted to beat Brendan to a bloody pulp. Xavier was mine, not his. He had no right to touch him, even if it was accidental.

I groaned and rolled over on my stomach. My phone vibrated against my hip and no I pulled it out to see a text from my mom. She wouldn't be home for a few more hours. I groaned again, then reached over to the bedside table and flipped the light of the lamp off. The room plunged into darkness and I slowly drifted to sleep with the sound of Lithium by Evanescence playing in my ear.