Life's Like This

Chapter One

I crossed my arms and laid my elbows on the table, with my chin in the "x". I thought about all that had happened. Jesse was shot, I had PTS, we had triplets, one died, then I starved myself and fainted and got a concussion.
I sighed as Jesse sat next to me.
"Whassamatter?"
"I'm ashamed of ourselves!"
"Uh... why?"
"Because we had fun last night, when we shoulda been mourning!"
"Becky.... that was for a good cause. You had to stay awake. We would've fallen asleep any other way."
I shrugged. What could I say? He was right. What else could we have done in order for my concussion to go away? We would've fallen asleep watching TV or reading or anything else. The only thing that kept us awake was making love.
"I suppose so."
Jesse smiled and kissed me. I kissed him in return.
"How's your head, Becky?" Joey asked.
I looked behind me. "Wha'?"
"How's your head?"
"Much better, thank you."
"Good." He smiled, almost lovingly.
I cocked my head, then shook the thought out. I just imagined it, Yeah. He really didn't smile like that. No.
******
Weeks later, we we went to Pattie's funeral. I couldn't stop crying; I was making a scene. I had to step out. Slowly I left the church, and sat on the steps. I watched my tears hit the concrete.
"Becky, sweetie, are you okay?" Jesse sat next to me.
"Is this how you felt when Pam died?"
Jesse sighed and put his arm around me. He didn't answer, he just cried.
"We should go back in." He helped me up and we walked back to our seats.
"Is everything okay?" Danny whispered to me.
"I'll be okay."
"Y'sure?"
"Yes. I'll be fine."
Despite the fact we were mourning the loss of Pattie, the funeral was quite nice.
After wards, Mrs. Katsopolis, Irene, came up to me and hugged me. "I'm so sorry."
I hugged her back. "Me, too. Me, too."