dead | ethan dolan

you asked someone to prom?

chapter forty two
——ethan's pov
april 16th, 2019

i pulled my jeep into the parking lot at the elementary school and took a spot at the back. there were a few other cars parked here, and at least twenty people playing touch football in the sun out on the little league baseball field. i spotted mackenzie right away. she was laughing as she tried to tag chad lancaster, but he dodged her outstretched fingers and scored, spiking the ball near the backstop.
all of his friends surrounded him and cheered.
what the hell was i doing here? these guys aren't gonna want me here.

i glanced at mackenzie again. she hadn't seen me yet. i could just bail. say something came up. tell her i was having a psychotic break when i'd texted yes after she'd asked me if i wanted to come.
what if my friends drove by and saw my car here?

i gripped the steering wheel tightly, then got out of the jeep. i was not going to let my stupid friends dictate what i could and couldn't do. just being here didn't automatically mean that me and mackenzie were a thing. i could have driven by, seen the game, and asked to join. besides, madeline hadn't spoken to me since my birthday, and she was the one who would have given me the most shit. fuck that.

a couple of the guys spotted me as i walked over. everyone stopped playing. yeah. this was a mistake.
"ethan! you came!" mackenzie shouted, her smile huge.
or maybe it wasn't.

she jogged forward and stopped in front of me. "hey."
"hey."
was i supposed to kiss her? hug her? i wanted to, but not with everyone staring at us like this.
"hey, guys. ethan's on my team," she said, turning to her friends.
"what? no way," chad said, palming the ball.
here we go. out with the crestie.

"you've already got twelve! he's on our team." jessica argued.
"but you guys have most of the guys." marshall defended, or at least tried to.
"what, like guys are better at this, or something?" mackenzie joked.
"uh yeah." marshall joked back.
she shoved him and he shoved her back, laughing. okay, so they weren't throwing me out, but i did not like this, whatever is was, between mackenzie and marshall.

"i'm on mack's team. she invited me, so that's where i'm going," i said.
"whatever," chad said, tossing me the ball. "we'll whoop your ass anyway."
"teah." i laughed. "we'll see."

mackenzie grinned as we took the field together. "you came," she said again.
"you thought i wouldn't?" now that i was here with her, the idea that i'd almost bailed seemed impossible.
"no. i'm just really happy you did." she smiled.
i smiled back, i was happy i did too.

okay, so, chad's team did end up beating our asses, but it was really fun. an hour later, we were all dirty and sweaty, drinking gatorade.
mackenzie and i had dropped down onto the rickety wooden bleachers and leaned back on our elbows as a few guys messed around on the old jungle gym.

"having fun?" mackenzie asked me.
"yeah." all i was thinking about was where to go after this, where i could smother in kisses with zero judgment.

"apparently cresties and norms can get along," she joked.
i felt a twinge of apprehension in my chest and shifted my weight. somehow this suddenly felt like a test. "yeah. i guess so."

"ethan! nice game." marshall walked over and slapped my hand.
"thanks," i said.
"so, i heard you're going to the prom with carrie ann sullivan," he said with a grin. "nice." he stretched out the word.
i almost choked on my gatorade.

"what?" mackenzie blurted.

i shot marshall a look of serious, painful death. ever so slowly, i capped my drink, put it down, and turned to look at mackenzie. my heart
pretty much stopped. she looked like i'd just run over her mom with my jeep. fuck. i already felt guilty for lying to her the other night when she'd brought up the paddy b's thing. now this.

"you asked someone to the prom?" she said.
"oh. oops. sorry, man," marshall said, backing off and looking confused. i wanted nothing more than to beat his ass. yeah, sure you are, buddy.

"why didn't you tell me?" mackenzie asked.
"can we talk about this somewhere else?" i said, getting up and tugging her away by her arm. she followed me over to a huge oak tree a few yards away from the bleachers. mackenzie leaned one hand against the trunk and looked down at the ground, kicking the dirt with her toe.

"what's wrong?" i asked.
"are you serious?" she asked.
"mack, come on. it's not like we could go to the prom together," i said.
"right, because it's okay for you to slum it with us norms out here, but god forbid a crestie take a norm to the prom. the whole world might collapse in on itself." she said sarcastically.
"you know that's not what i meant," i said.

she shook her head, staring past me. "i just can't believe you're going with someone else."
"what'd you want me to do, stay home?" i asked, my face screwing up in disbelief.
"that's what I'm doing," she shot back.
oh. shit. "well, i can't. everyone's going. and if i don't go, it's going to look—"
"who cares how it looks?" she demanded. then she stared at her feet again. "do you, like, like this girl?" her face turned sad.

"no, i don't even know her," i replied quickly. this had to get me some points. "i only asked her because the idiot twins wanted me to."
"so, you're taking some sophomore you don't even know to the prom," she said flatly.

god. i couldn't get anything right in this conversation.
"why? would it be better if i asked someone i've already hooked up with?" i blurted.
mackenzie's jaw dropped. yeah. that may have been the wrong this to say.
"i need to go." she squeaked and ran past me.

her dramatic exit caused the attention of some of the guys, who stared at me. great. just great. now they were going to kick my ass. i had no doubt i could beat every single one of them up. but all together? i was a dead man.

mackenzie grabbed her duffel bag from the bottom bleacher and speed walked toward the parking lot. marshall took off at a jog after her, and i was left there facing chad and the rest of the guys, who were all standing by the bleachers with their chins out like they were ready to rumble.

"chicks," i said dismissively.

they didn't laugh. it was time for me to go. over in the parking lot, mackenzie got on her bike and took off. then marshall got on his and took off after her. what the hell was going on with those two?
"thanks for the game. i'll uh, see you around." i walked towards my car, upset.

"dammit," i said under my breath as i started the engine. i slammed the heel of my hand into the steering wheel and sat back, unable to get the picture of mackenzie's hurt face out of my mind. i knew it was a bad idea, coming here. it had just turned out to be a bad idea for reasons i hadn't even considered.

but the one thing i hated more than marshall moss was myself.

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[1277 words]
-m
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