Do you ever just sit somewhere and think? I've always wondered if "we" could be a thing. I knew he used to have feelings for me but now he was dating my best friend. It didn't work that way. It's a struggle having feelings toward someone who you can't be with.
*****
I sat on my bed texting Josh non stop. My best friend and him recently broke up and now he was supposedly "done" with her and he moved on to me. Obviously he didn't like me. He was just in need of a girlfriend. I didn't want him breaking my heart when someone better came along. So the best thing for me to do was push him away. He kept saying such sweet things to me but I knew rule #1 I couldn't do that to me or my best friend.
Pushing him away was hard as hell.
Even though I liked him a lot. I had to tell myself I didn't.
& telling him I was over him was such a hard big lie I shouldn't have ever said. &
I did which ruined a lot for me.
