Just Us Three 'Best Friends' [5SOS || Ashton Irwin] [DISCONTINUED]

Chapter 3 : Tourschooling & Banana Wars

- Ashton -

"Hey Ashton... Ashton... Ashton... ASHTON!"

"What is it Calum?" I answer, annoyed.

"What are you doing?" Calum asks.

"I'm breathing, what does it look like I'm doing?"

"Cool. Hey Michael... Michael... MICHAEL!"

Michael sticks out his middle finger.

"Fine. Hey Lu--"

"Get away from me Calum."

"And those were my bandmates. Bye guys! Why do you guys hate me?" Calum asks as he posts the Keek. "I'm not doing anything wrong."

"That's the point. You're boring." Michael says, not looking up from his phone.

"I'm not boring!" Calum says enthusiastically. "I can dance!"

Luke does this really weird eye roll where at some point his eyes are dilating.

"Hahaha idiot!" Michael slaps the back of Luke's head. "That was so lame."

Luke makes a serious face and stands by Calum's side. He hangs his head down. Calum wraps an arm around his shoulder.

"Welcome to the dark side, Luke." Calum growls in a deep voice. "I'm glad you decided to join. Cake was always better than Mashton anyway."

"I agree shizzles, Calum." Luke says in a deeper voice, if that was even possible.

"Michael?" I say, looking at him. He has a smirk on his face.

"You think what I'm thinking, tour buddy?"

"Oh yes, Michael. I think I am thinking what you're thinking." I grin. I knew what was coming.

"DERPBALL REMATCH!" He screams. "GET THE SHORT SHORTS!"

I frown. "I thought we would like, throw mushrooms at them or something."

Michael rolls his eyes NORMALLY, not like Luke, and says, "We want to crush them, Ashton, DEMOLISH them. Not shower them with bits of happiness. We need to be cruel, heartless. And we need the short shorts." He emphasizes on the last part.

Luke and Calum stay in their positions, not moving.

"I mean you two, the Asian and the idiot, get the short shorts!" Michael yells.

"I hate you Michael." Luke and Calum both say at the same time.

"Go!" I yell as well, shooing them.

"But we can't play derpball in a bus." Luke frowns.

"Oh my dumb minded subject, who ever said we would be playing IN the bus?" Michael says, giving him the 'are you for real' look. "Obviously we have to play outside the bus."

"Uh... I knew that. Hey, I got an email!" Luke exclaims, turning away from us. "From a water bottle company! They talked to management, and they said they want us to be models for water bottles."

So now we're talking about water.

"Luke, you don't have to hide your embarrassment by saying we're invited to drink water at some company while they film us chugging it." Calum states. "You know what? Screw the dark side, you can stay there yourself."

"No no, really, look!" Luke gives the phone to Michael as he scans the screen.

"Hmm... Water... Invite... Company... Publicity... Promoting..." He murmurs, scrolling down. Suddenly his eyes widen and he smirks. "What's this? Who's this Charlotte girl? Ooooh, you have a girlfriend! Let's see what you two have been saying!"