"it's kennedy, nice to see you." i said lowly, trying to hide the sadness in my voice as the boy i loved and grew up with didn't even know who i was.
"nice to see you too, honey," he used to call me that years ago. he grinned, looking down at me slightly because of the height difference. i've stayed around the same height since high school. 5'4 and a half. the half definitely counts. shawn always used to make fun of me for my height, but he was a literal tree.
"get ready, on the count of 3!" his photographer shouted, interrupting my thoughts as we posed for a quick picture. after the flash went off, shawn pulled me in for another hug as my sadness consumed me realizing this was really it. shawn forgot. i need to forget, too. this proved that i need to move on. love him from afar. we aren't the same. we will never be the same.
"i could never forget those eyes. i'll text you, yeah? see you later ken." he whispered in my ear as we pulled apart from the hug. looking up at him, i gave him a small smile. "see you." i said quietly, as i exited the meet and greet area.
the concert started about an hour and a half later. it was crazy to see him selling out arenas as big as this. i sang along to every song, snapchatting a few videos and dancing around with tiffany. awaiting this text.
the concert ended around 11pm, still no text from shawn. i knew it. he became a stuck up, snobby celebrity who plays with peoples emotions and somehow thrives off of it. we found our car, and began the drive home. traffic is insane in new york, but when you add a concert in to the jam packed streets, it makes it ten times worse.
the drive consisted of me ranting about shawn, tiffany complaining about her classes she had tomorrow, and a lot of music blasting jam sessions. we finally made it home around 2am, after being in traffic for nearly 2 hours.
"thanks for inviting me to come with you tonight. despite how it turned out, i'm glad you got somewhat of the closure you needed. delete his number. delete his pictures. he's not worth your stress anymore baby," tiffany said, pulling me in for a hug.
as much as i knew she was right, i couldn't get myself to do that. i loved him too much to forget about him. sure, i could erase his number, not text him, delete our pictures. but nothing in the world could stop me from thinking about him. loving him.
"thanks tiff, and thank you for coming with. you're my rock." i sighed, squeezing her slightly.
we said goodnight as we both went our separate ways in to our rooms. putting my hair in a bun, i wiped my makeup off, washed my face, brushed my teeth, put on some sweats and climbed in bed, ready for this day to finally be over.
scrolling through instagram, i decided to post a picture from tonight. shawn had already forgotten to text me, yet here i was, at 3am, still finding any way to get his attention. praying that by some slim chance, he would see my post, out of the 39million other followers he has. love makes you do crazy things, i guess.
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@kennedyrose: you really went & became a star on me. i knew u would. congrats, mendes ❤️
👤: @shawnmendes
@tiffanyjenkins: you're a good photographer & all but Go To Bed!!!!!
@carlyrose: jealous!!! was it amazing? he's so hot 😩 @kennedyrose: he's very talented.
@lucasjones: soooo when do we get the reunion pic??
realizing my instagram plan didn't work either, i gave up. i was too tired to even care anymore.
setting my alarm, i plugged my phone in to the charger and put my phone on my nightstand. sleep was what i needed. a lot of it. everything being silent with just the noise of my ceiling fan relaxed me enough to doze off in to a deep, cozy, sleep. until my phone went off. is it really 11am already? god, sleep hours feel so short.
slowly opening my eyes to adjust to the sunlight, i realized there was no light at all. did i sleep the whole next day, too?
i grabbed my phone to check the time. 6am. i unlocked it to see who would need to reach me at this ungodly hour of the morning.
1 missed call from Shawn 🌲 Shawn: I know you're probably sleeping, so when you get this just call me. I really want to talk. Thank you for coming tonight Ken.
