Running From The Truth (by Emma)

Chapter 2- Despair

Chapter 2- Despair

"Khushi?" he whispered in a completely broken voice.

"Ar...Arnav??" she asked in an equally broken voice.

"You guys know each other??" Asked a confused NK.

Arnav couldn't believe it was her. After 4 long years, here she was in front of him. He always knew she would come back to him, where she truly belonged. But he had never thought that she would present herself in the house as NK's girlfriend. He felt as if a thousand knives had just stabbed his stone heart. This was what he deserved, was it not? The punishment for letting go of her in the first place? Her and NK...how could it be?

"Yes NK, we went to school together when we were younger" said Khushi sadly.

"Wow! That's awesome! I can't believe you never told me Khush!" exclaimed NK.

"I never knew you guys were related'" said Khushi, her eyes full of despair as she stared at Arnav.

"Well now you know! Nannav mere bhai is my cousin! He's my chacha's son. He's a business dude, so he's always away which is why you haven't seen him here before today" said NK happily. "Well I guess I don't need to do any introductions for you guys then! Kyun Arnav, you already know my beauty don't you? You gotta tell me how she was when she was younger! She was probably really crazy, na?" laughed NK, wrapping an arm around her waist and kissing her on the cheek.

Arnav felt like he was going to throw up. He couldn't believe that NK was touching and kissing his Khushi, right in front of his eyes. And he had to let him do so, when all he really wanted to do was rip his head off.

If it was even possible, Khushi looked even more beautiful than he remembered her being. Wearing a beautiful peach and gold anarkali, she looked like she lost a bit of weight, her face matured in some ways making her look a tad bit older. Her skin was still that beautiful creamy colour and her eyes were still the most beautiful shade of hazel. They looked into each other's eyes, and Arnav saw the pain. He felt terrible. All he wanted to do was hug her tight, and tell her that everything would be okay. That he would take care of her and love her, but he couldn't. He had been waiting, and now he was as helpless as ever.

*Flashback*

July 2006

It was almost a month after prom. Arnav hadn't slept properly after that horrible night. He had dreams of her; he saw her face etched with sadness. He saw tears in her eyes, and every morning he woke up with tears in his eyes as well. During the day, he heard her tinkling laugh, remembered her crazy antics and the emotions that would run through her face. Her pout when she was upset, her brilliant smile when she was excited, how she would bite her nails when she was nervous, and how adorable she looked when she was scared. He thought about her carefully every minute of everyday since that night, he thought about his decision of not wanting love and realized what an idiot he had been.

That night, after breaking Khushi's heart, he had entered the hall sadly only to find his friends telling one another that the plan worked, they had done it all on purpose to ruin Arnav. He had beaten the living hell out of them, and left to go find her, but she was long gone.

How stupid could he be? He had the most beautiful and pure creature right in front of him and he let her go. Even after she confessed her love to him, how could he let her go?? How could he listen to his friends over the love of his life? No, it hadn't been anyone's fault that night other than his; any guy would have wanted her. Hell, even he would do something terrible at the moment if it meant getting her back. So he came to a conclusion. He loved Khushi, with all his heart and he would never let her go. He would hold on to her until his last breath, because she meant everything to him. So what if he was late in realizing? She couldn't have stopped loving him! Of course, she wouldn't take him back right away, she would be terribly upset. But he would spend every minute making it up to her, if that's what it took. After all, they were going to the same University together, what could be more perfect? He decided that he would tell her everything tomorrow, during their graduation ceremony. Everything would hopefully work out.

The next day, he dressed to perfection. It was graduation after all, and the day he would see his Khushi. As he headed to school with his family, he looked around everywhere for her, but could not find her. He suddenly spotted one of her friend's Meera.

"Hey, Meera!' he shouted as he saw her walking away.

She turned, and her eyes widened slightly in shock. She had never talked to him before. "Arnav? What's up?"

"Do you know where Khushi is?" he asked out of breath.

"Uhm, I'm guessing you didn't hear about her then'" she said sadly.

"What? What do you mean?? What happened?!?" he asked frantically.

"Her parents died in a car accident last night. Poor girl, imagine losing two people like that, especially on a day that's supposed to be happy! Anyways, she left the country to go live with her Bua in Canada. She was supposed to go to NYU Stern, but she had to talk to the ministry last minute and switch universities. Good thing she had already applied to a University in Canada, and was accepted too. So now she's living there with her Bua, and she'll be attending school there. She always wanted to go there anyways, I don't know why she chose NYU in the first pl -Arnav??" but all she saw was his retreating back as he practically ran away from her.

The students of Walt Whitman High school gathered together for their graduation, and when Khushi Gupta's name was announced and no one came up, Arnav felt tears stinging in the back of his eyes. He couldn't believe all this had happened within such a short period of time. Why didn't he tell her? How did everyone else know, except him! She had just had her heart broken by him, and then to find out her parents were dead...he couldn't even imagine what she had gone through. And now she was gone, forever. He had lost his chance because of his stupidity and his big fat ego. When he got into his room that night, he started throwing things, breaking things and ripping things. This is probably how she felt...No Arnav, she had it much worse. He closed his eyes and pretended to sleep when his Di walked in.

"Chote, I brought you dinner and you have a letter as well...Oh! Already sleeping, probably very tired. I'll just leave the letter here then, he can read it in the morning" she said to herself with a smile, and left the room.

A letter? Could it possibly be from'? He jumped out of bed to his desk, and sure enough it was hers, he could notice her neat and perfect handwriting from miles away. He let his fingers smooth over the page that she had once written on, and slowly started to read.

Dearest Arnav,

I just really wanted to apologize. I'm sorry for saying all of those things that night; it was very stupid of me, especially since I always knew that you never felt the same. That night, after you had spoken to me, I got a call telling me that my parents had died in a car accident. I realized in that moment that I had lost everything. My parents and the guy I loved the most. But I have no choice but to cope by myself, and now I'm moving to Canada with my aunt. I will be going to University there as well, which is good because I desperately need a fresh start so I can move on. I don't know if I will ever get to see you again, but if not, I just want to thank you. Thank you for being my friend; whenever I'll think back to my childhood and my schools, I know I'll think of you first. You taught me a great lesson in life: We don't always get what we want. I also want you to know that none of this is your fault, and don't even think of holding yourself responsible. You spoke your feelings ' the truth, and so did I. Sometimes things have to change, and maybe sometimes they're for the better. I'm sorry for rambling on so much, but you must know how hard it is for me to write this and say goodbye. And I'm sure you can understand how hard it is when you lose both parents. Anyways, no matter what happens in the future, whether I move on or not, whether I'm sad or happy, whether I'm near or far, you Arnav Singh Raizada will always be my first love. * We accept the love we think we deserve. And Arnav, I definitely don't deserve you.. You're far too good, and I hope that one day you find a girl worthy of your love. I'm sorry I'm repeating myself, and probably sounding like the most stupid person in the world, but I just need to say this one last time -I love you. Take care of yourself, and always be happy.

Yours truly,

Khushi

He clutched the letter tighter in his hands and cried himself to sleep.

*Flashback over*

Today he stood watching the girl he loved, walking away with someone else.