Right Next Door

Chapter 4

Maggie

On the first Monday of each month, Maggie visits her counselor Dr. Rhodes. She started the appointments about six months after Paul's death, at the urging of Robert.

Placing a business card in her hand, Robert clasped his hand over hers and pleaded with Maggie to seek help in sorting out her grief in the wake of Paul's death.

"Just think about it," he whispered. "I hate to see you in so much pain, Mags."

"I'll think about it," she promised. "I'm sorry to put such a burden on you. I feel like I'm drowning without him, Rob."

Robert enveloped Maggie into a hug and gently explained, "You're not a burden, Maggie. Don't for one second think that what you're feeling isn't validated. I just don't know how to help you and I think if you spoke with someone who could help you navigate through this loss, you'd be able to find the light again. I just want to see you smile and know that you're sleeping through the night."

At first she felt extremely uncomfortable talking about her grief to a counselor, but as their weekly sessions turned into bi-monthly sessions and bi-monthly sessions to once a month sessions, she valued her time spent with Dr. Rhodes and knew the day Robert handed her that business card was the best thing he could have ever done for her healing.

Maggie came to regard Dr. Rhodes as a confidante. The only family Maggie had left were Paul's parents who lived in North Carolina. When Paul was alive they became estranged because they couldn't support his decision to settle down in Seattle. When they learned he was staying on the West Coast with the intent to marry Maggie, they took a dislike to her as well. Even after Aaron was born, they visited maybe once a year, Christmas usually, and would send presents for birthdays. After Paul died, the visits stopped altogether. Maggie felt they blamed his death on her, not literally of course, but figuratively. They reasoned if Paul had only moved back home to North Carolina, he would still be alive to this day, following in the lawyer steps his father took and settling down with a Southern Belle of high society in Raleigh.

Last year Maggie received a call from Evelyn, Paul's mother, saying they couldn't make a trip out to Seattle during the summer, so they'd like for Aaron to fly out to the East Coast instead for an extended trip. Maggie refused, saying if they wanted to see their grandson, they needed to make the effort or forget it. (Maggie spent one Christmas in Raleigh when Aaron was two but the whole trip was horrible. Evelyn and Paul, Sr. shamed Maggie for keeping them apart from their grandchild, said that living in Seattle was unsafe and things would be 'so much easier for her' if she had family close by to look after her son. After that trip, she refused to step foot with Aaron in North Carolina and forced Paul's parents to make more of an effort to be a part of her child's life.)

They compromised that year and entertained Aaron around Seattle at a ridiculously expensive hotel, taking him to every attraction for a week and dropping him off on their way back to the airport. Aaron was still young enough to believe his grandparents hung the moon, but it was hurtful that her only living family members treated her like an outcast.

Her session with Dr. Rhodes today went like many others. She talked about her fears, her defeats and successes that occurred in the past month. She reported the times she set aside for personal reflection and growth and discussed Aaron's progression of comprehension and grief in dealing with the loss of his father.

"What about your love life, Maggie?" Doctor Rhodes would bring up said topic sparingly during their sessions and Maggie tried her hardest to divert any mention of dates, boyfriends or love interest.

"Nothing new to report, Doc," Maggie replied flippantly. "I'm not there yet."

"Maggie," Dr. Rhodes began, "it's been four years and you haven't been on a single date. You don't have close family and the only people you socialize with are your part-time co-workers and your late husband's work partner."