Passing Through

Part Thirty Two

A/N Another quick chapter, had a very lazy, writing weekend! Short chapter, you'll hate the ending,but I promise next one asap. Stick with me! MZx

Chapter Thirty Two

"So are you meeting him tonight?"

Steph had a stool pulled up to the counter and was demolishing a bowl of home made granola and a coffee as she watched Natasha prep for the coming day. She often stopped in for breakfast when she was working early, especially as Natasha was so busy that it was so much less often than it had been, and today's came with a dose of what she hoped was good advice.

"You think I should?" Despite everything she was still so unsure, so divided on what she wanted to do and what she felt she should do.

She met Natasha's eyes, then smiled at her, "I think you like him, I think it's already hurting you, so would it hurt more to hear what he has to say?"

It sounded so simple in those terms, but maybe it was that simple. Steph was right, she was already emotionally involved with him, he occupied her thoughts so much. He was an idiot, he was annoying, infuriating, but he'd also been romantic, he'd been so caring, she'd never had a man so happy, so desperate to please her, and in bed...shit, she never knew it could be like that, she'd had more orgasms in his arms, than she'd had in the rest of her life. It was eye opening, and not just reserved for romance books. She'd been starved of that affection, that connection all her life, admittedly by choice, but now that he was under her skin, in her world, charming her...she wanted more, with him.

Then on the complete flip, he had ripped her to shreds, told her she was trying to fix him, that he didn't want her to fix him, pushing her away, not gently, but angrily, verbally violently. And that hurt, it cut her to the core. For every inch she'd given him over he imaginary boundary, he'd strode a mile and that left her open, vulnerable, exposed.

Was she able to walk into a restaurant, listen to him, decipher what he wanted without being sucked in? Freya said he looked terrible, she didn't want that, didn't want to influence him, but it also made er wonder if he was sorry, if he felt he made a mistake.

It would give some satisfaction, knowing that he wanted her back, wanted more. But he still wasn't about to commit to a future, to there being something more once this season ended. If she spent another three of four months with him, spending time together, sharing time, sharing beds...then her heart would probably break irreparably. And she wasn't ready or capable of that.

So did she go?

She didn't know. She really didn't.

Another day in college, another bout of lessons, and more 'homework', when he left the college at the end of the day, he felt like a naughty school boy, slipping away. But his mind was blown, the stress of the coming evening was weighing heavily on him.

He had to keep remembering Coop's words, because the moment he turned up at his home, he had helped him instantly. Ushering them in to his home office, he'd sat him on the sofa next to the desk and handed him a beer.

"What's up?"

Two words, but they were just what Bo needed to hear. And he slumped, head in hands and managed, "I've fucked up."

As he explained all the complete screw ups he'd made, both since his injury and with Natasha, because this wasn't a small thing, this was everything in his life. Coop sat there and listened, his face relaxed, no hint of judgement.