Letters to Fred [CURRENTLY OPEN TO REQUESTS]

Hermione

Dear Fred,

This isn't the usual way I'd speak to you, I must admit. That said, I didn't tend to speak to you all that often.

Excluding when you helped me with Ron. It's odd thinking you'll never see us together. You helped the relationship start. Pointers here and there. Hints dropped to us. Little things.

But when you're not there to tell anyone the little things, how do we do the big things?

I miss you. We all do. And yes, greuf affects people in different ways, but losing you is a pain we all share, because it's like a pang in the chest. There's a gap in the family. A wound. It's too Saint-like. We're all holey.

George has more than just the gap where his ear should be; you're missing, and that's a big part of him.

I'm not trying to make you feel guilty. There's so much any of us could have done. And I know it's in the nature of a war to lose people. But some people are so un-losable that when they go it's just not right.

Like losing an attachment to your keyring, but not the keys themselves. Except I'm not calling you a keyring.

Maybe that wasn't the best analogy. But if you can read this, I know that you get my point.

I'm *riddled* filled with guilt for not doing anything.

I'm not sure what else to say really. I won't say that we're all well, because no one is. No one ever will be. Nightmares will most surely haunt us all forevermore.

Charlie doesn't know we know, but he drinks. He reeks of alcohol. Bill and Fleur are due to have a kid. Percy keeps disappearing, so everyone is placing bets on what it's for - I think he has a girlfriend. George is... He better than most people think. It's struck him hard, but he's doing the best out of all of us really. Ron is Ron. We're together now, so that's at least one good thing. Harry blames himself. Ginny is confused but strong. Your mum breaks down, but we all do. Your dad is often subdued.

This is turning out to be rather long now, so I guess until the next time.

-Hermione.