Emotion and feelings- Shizaya

Ch.9

Izaya's POV:
At my apartment...
I made it through the door and fell onto the floor, as the door shut behind me. It hurt but not as much as that brutes grasp. I tried to get up but I failed. The wound hurt too much, my head hurt too much. That fall hurt a lot. My body feels hot, my breathing is getting faster. I needed medicine, I need something to get up. Maybe its better if laid here on the cold floor. No one gets hurt, and Shizu-chan can forget about me. Shizu-chan can forget about someone like me. Someone like me who hurts others. Someone like me doesn't deserve love.
Someone like me doesn't deserve him.
Someone like me shouldn't even be alive.
"This is perfect", I mumbled.
Suddenly the door opened and I saw a flash of yellow. My vision was blurry, I couldn't make out who it was until I heard the voice.
" You idiot", he said as he picked me up.
"Shizu-chan", I thought before falling asleep in his arm.
Shizuo's POV:
He's got a fever. He looks horrible right now, he's pale, it looks like he'll die any minute. But why does he look relaxed in my arms. He was able to fall asleep, even though a pervert like me, is holding him.
I carried him up to his room, and laidhim on his bed. I got a cold rag and placed it on his head. I went to his bathroom and looked behind the mirror for medicine. There was a thermometer, and a bottle of Moltron, that helps fevers. I grabbed it, and then I looked at the medicine Shinra gave me. It was pain relief pills, hopefully he'll take them for me. Considering I practically thought about raping him.
Just put the word RAPIST in permanent marker on my forehead, I thought before face palming myself.
I walked over to Izaya, and sat the medicine on the night stand beside him. His room looks smaller from the outside, but even though it's this big it feels very lonely. This apartment is nice, but it's just him isn't it, how can anyone live in such a big place by themselves. It's kind of sad. I grabbed his left hand. It felt really warm. His hand was relaxed, it looked pale and almost lifeless. Izaya is very pale now that I think about it.
I saw his eyes open slowly, he probably feels like shit.
"Shizu-chan, why", he asked.
" Why what, Izaya ", I asked.
" Why did you help me, someone like me shouldn't receive help, especially not from the person who I torment on a daily basis", he said.
"You don't remember what I told you, you idiot", I asked.
"What did you even tell me, all you did was kiss me, and try to feel me up", he asked.
That's right I didn't tell him how I felt about him, I'm such a idiot.
" I love you", I said.