hoping in the way people still stargaze on stormy nights
that the remaining fractions of our relatinonship were to
somehow reassemble is like an irresistible drug to me
as was everything with you.
escape, flight -
overdose quickly flooding my hollow, broken heart
each time i saw your starry eyes twinkling in a way i used to know
for yet another's sky, not mine.
in the biggest crowd imaginable,
i still search endlessly for your golden smile
with the light of a thousand suns and
the warmth of the fire lit in the cold snow,
despite knowing i would never be the cause of it again.
i drown in regret, your words weighing me down as they act as rocks in my pockets
although i try to move on and get through,
your ghost moves silently throughout every aspect of the day -
haunting me as if a cruel reminder of how
one wrong, thoughtless move caused me to lose the
light between unforgiving oceans.
the universe is cold and unfeeling;
blind, in a way
they never see anything but my mistakes
i yearn for your touch.
what wonder your familiar voice
would be to my exhausted soul.
what phenomenon the past is
i mourn in the twisted present.
i saw all our broken heartbeats flatline in the blink of an eye,
all our laughter and passion fading just as quickly
as dewy raindrops on the harsh concrete sidewalk.
i saw all our promises that once bloomed with such certainty in rose
wither and get whisked away by the bony fingers of death.
we were gold
but amidst time and the
painful dance of reality,
we rusted.
as i watch you helplessly disappear from my grasp,
we become strangers once more -
my heart aches terribly,
beating and toiling in hell's fiery pits for you
and our tarnished gold.
a/n: aaaa tysm for reading! 💛 so basically this'll just be a collection of things i write. i really hope y'all like it. rEMEMBER DON'T FORGET TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES,,,