The church was filled with various people. All of her beloved friends from her childhood. Her old coworkers at the bank. And all the kids from the orphanage, where she use to volunteer at least two days a week, even though she was busy struggling with raising her own daughter by herself.
She was selfless. She always put other people first, no matter what situation may occurred to be. She told me that if you treat people with kindness, you will get to experience what real happiness was, trough seeing others happy. That you will find happiness in the laughter and smile of others.
There was not once in my life where I felt unloved, and for that I will be forever grateful. I could always look into her eyes, and feel like I belonged. My dear mother, I love you.
My eyes was filled with tears. It got to the point where I found myself wondering if I ever would be able to stop. It felt as if I was drowning in my own tears, and sorrow.
Taehyung held my hand tightly. He stroke his thumb over my hand, over and over. It was like a signal. He didn't have to tell me, but I knew what he was saying trough his affectionate actions. He told me that he was here for me. That he was going to be there for me from now on.
At my other side, it was Jimin. He sat with his fingers braided together in between his legs. He played nervously with his fingers. I knew him well, I knew how he was in situations like this. Jimin couldn't stay still, not for one, tiny second. He was tense, and his feet trampled rapidly against the floor.
Her casket was filled with tulips everywhere. It was her favorite flower. They were colored in every color of the rainbow. The picture of her were placed at a place where every single one in the room could be reminded of her beauty.
Seeing the picture of her face at the palette, made me hurt even more. It hurt knowing I never will get to meet her ever again. She told me to believe there was a heaven, because she was going to wait for me there. She told me she would look down at me, and become my guardian angel from the above.
My mind told me that it was unrealistic. But a part of me still held on to it. I repeatedly told myself that I would meet her again, that I some day will reunite and live happily forever.
The sound of cries almost drowned the sweet words of the priest. I noticed Taehyung kept looking down at me, I could tell that he worried. He did not let go of my hand once, he just kept on stroking my hand with his thumb.
It made me calmer knowing he was at my side. I tried to focus on the good things in my life, even though I could not walk for a week. My stomach was hurting really bad, and scars were left on my skin, like a memory of the horrific incident. It has only gone one hour since I got out of the hospital. It was still the day I found out that my mother no longer was with us.
Today was the only day the church could hold a funeral in a long time, and the people at the hospital recommended me to send out messages right away. Taehyung, Jin and Jimin mostly did that part. I was still too weak to do anything yet, and it felt awful. Not only that couldn't I help out, but also feeling like I was useless.
The one thing I did was to make sure to get tulips for my mother. In the messages that was sent out, they were told to bring tulips. Thankfully, everyone obliged.
..
Taehyung and Jimin, each helped me over in the wheelchair. The casket was buried out, and everyone was following after. I was not strong enough to stroll the wheelchair by myself, so Taehyung strolled me.
It was cold outside. The sky was as gray as the rocks below us, that were rattling by the steps of all the different people, walking slowly on them. The autumn weather was starting to show off, as the leaves of the trees were colored in dark red, yellow and orange.
