I'm always a nervous wreck, as you might be able to tell, but this was so much bigger in my eyes. I had to tell a sweet, innocent little girl that her mother took her own life. I'd always feel like such an awful human being for doing so. But, I'd feel just as--if not, more--awful keeping it from her.
I paced in the hallway where mine and Ava's room was, trying to make up my mind as to how I should tell her. That's when Trinity came up to me. Something seemed off about her now.
"Oh, hello, Trin--" She suddenly knocked me down with a single blow. Now I realized what's wrong; she's pissed about something.
"You," she growled. "Because of you, Pogan's a nervous wreck at the moment." Him, too? "Stay away from him, you anxiuos bitch." I cocked my head and smiled sickly sweet. I got up and stood tall, letting her continue her pointless rant. "I'm surprised you haven't gotten Ava killed yet."
Now let me tell you a little about myself.
I'm a decent person. I'm not God sent, I'm not hell sent, I'm decent. But as soon as you bring family--ESPECIALLY SIBLINGS--into a fight, you'd better prepare yourself.
I put her in a tight chokehold and grinned maniacly. "Wanna say that again!? Huh!?" I jostled her a few times for good measure, feeding off the terror filling her eyes. She knows what I'm capable of.
"No-no! I take it back, I was just playing!"
"Bull!" I hissed, tossing her to the ground like yesterday's zombie. She looked up in fear as I loomed over her. "Bring Ava into something like that again, and I won't be so merciful." She nodded, and that's when I heard a little angel's voice from the nearest doorway.
"Mana?" It was my turn to look up in fear: Ava was at the door, half hidden, her eyes glossy under the glass eye protector of her gas mask.
"Ava, dear. How long have you been there?"
"I heard a thud and saw you on the floor. I wanted to help, but I remembered what you said: 'Don't be a hero'." That's right, that's one of the first rules of the apocalypse I taught her.
"It's a good thing you didn't. Trinity was just acting... silly." Moronic. I trudged over and hugged Ava, picking her up and balancing her on my hip.
"Can you sing me a song, Mana?" she asked. I glared over at Trinity, still standing there like the idiot she is.
"In a little bit. I have to tell you something very important, dear." I took her into our room, shutting and locking the door. I didn't care if Trinity eavesdropped or not, all I needed to do now was tell Ava what had happened with her mother. I sat her on the cot, then kneeled at her eye level. "Ava, you know your mama loves you very much, right?" She nodded. I gulped before continuing, "Well, early this morning, she wasn't thinking properly and... didn't remind herself of how much she loves you." I heard sniffling, and my heart broke in my throat.
Don't cry, Ariana.
"Wh-What does tha-that mean?"
"It means that this morning, she got into an accident, and she didn't... make it through."
"Is my mommy de-dead?"
Don't cry, Ariana!
"... Yes." She collapsed onto her side, hugging herself and crying harder than before. I climbed into the cot with her and tried to comfort her, letting her cry into my faded uniform, letting her scream at the sky to her heart's discontent.
"Didn't she-she-she remember me? And my cousin? A-And you?"
"I don't know. I wish I had been there to save her..." I sucked up any tears threatening to spill, reminding myself not to break down now.
Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry.
---
Ava stayed in from school the next day, moping around even when I took her on scouting runs. I couldn't blame her, though.
By lunch, I put in a special request for a chocolate chip cookie for Ava. Sweets are usually reserved for birthdays, but I told him the situation, and he completely understood. Pogan brought her to me after showing her the resevoir and letting her take a walk on the old structures poking out of the water. It didn't really help, but at least she got out of the base.
"How was the walk?"
"Hm..."
"Well, I got a surprise for you!" I let her hop on my back, and I piggy-backed her to the cafeteria. There, a 1' diameter cookie awaited her.
---
When she saw it, she got so excited.
"Wow!! I didn't know they still make cookies during the end of the world!!" I laughed and let her hop off my back, watching her sprint toward the table in such glee. She seated herself and dug right in with a fork and knife. But, before she ate the first piece, she stopped. "Is this all for me?"
"It's all for you, dear."
"Wow..." She took her first bite; she immediately fell in love with it. I knew the chef that crafted this large, decadent cookie had studied culinary arts in Europe, so it must have tasted delicious.
As long as she's happy, I'm happy, and by the looks of it, she was ecstatic.
