Poems of the truth.

Giving up

Most days I think about what it would be like when I'm not around. I mean soon I'll be buried in the ground. So what will the world be like if I simply gave up? I have no life anyway, I just stay in my cave like room all day. I go to school and find myself falling asleep, my friend couldn't believe it. She scolded at me. It's understandable. I need sleep. I can't sleep since I feel so weak all the damn time. I'm tired of lying and saying "I'm fine." While really I'm holding everything inside my fucked up mind. It makes my cries for help silent. No one can hear except for me. To be completely honest it scares me. My life has no meaning, so just leave me a knife and I'll end my own life. Since apparently me being alive in this world was a big crime. So here I am telling you, how hard it is for someone like me. With a horrible personality that no one can see. Feels like it'll last for an eternity, This feeling of dread and the littlest effort to get out of bed. With people in my life who think they can mend me, have made a grave mistake just talking to me. I'm walking this path and I'm alone. Even when people are with me, I try not to show how lonely I feel inside. When someone gets to close, it crosses a line. Eventually that someone will just die. I'm tired of waking up feeling like I've just been shot. While my demons are plotting their revenge probably letting me rot like a dead corpse. I just wish I had my own little fort with a safe vibe, so I don't have to worry about people hearing me cry. That can't happen, since I would be bragging about somewhere no one else can be. Even though their the ones that have it all easy. You wonder why I want to give up? Here's your answer. I hope you like it, now will you excuse me I have to leave. I'm going to use the knife I was stabbed with in my back so deep. That way, I can finally get some sleep.