Why Can't You Love Me?

Chapter 11

Jimin's Pov

After the soup my mom made I'm feeling way better so I decide to go to Kookie's house. "Mom, I'm going to Jungkook and Tae's house!" I say and she answers "Ok dear, see you later" I get out of my house and start walking to Kookie's. As I get closer to the door I hear a punch from inside. What was that? I ask in my hand as I ring the door bell. I then remember I have the key and open the door. 

As I look inside the house I see Yoongi. I'm brought back to reality as Kookie and Yoongi say "Jiminie?" Without thinking I go and hug Yoongi. He hugs me back and I try not to cry, I am unable to as tears start falling down my face. "How've you been doing?" I ask him "I'm fine thank you couz" as he says that both Kookie and Tae's eyes widen. "He's your cousin?" Kookie asks me disgust when he says the word 'he' I get defensive over Yoongi and say "Yes, and why are you saying the word 'he' with disgust"

"Simple" Jungkook answers "He's gay" I am a little bit shocked as I didn't know Yoongi was gay but then answer "And what's the big deal with that?" "IT'S FORBIDDEN, IT'S A SIN AND IT'S DISGUSTING!" He answers shouting. "It's his fault if he's gay and you have nothing to do with it." I say calmly "IT IS MY DEAL IF HE'S DATING MY YOUNGER BROTHER!" He shouts again. Wait... I widen my eyes as my mind processes this. "YOONGI IS DATING TAEHYUNG!" I shout shocked as fuck. I knew they would get together but I didn't think it would be this soon

I look at Tae Tae who is blushing furiously as Yoongi smirks. " Damn it I lost my bet" I say and everyone looks at me like 'What bet'. "I was so sure Tae would be top in this relationship..." I say as Yoongi and Tae laugh and Jungkook looks at me like I'm not Jimin anymore. My heart clenches as I try not to cry again today, but just like the first time I fail. No one understands why I'm crying as they look concerned at me. "Are you ok Jiminie?" Kookie says with the smoothest voice ever and rubs my back.

I hug him as I shake my head no. "Tell me Jiminie, what is it?" he asks. I can't tell him... Or else he'll hate me. "It's nothing, can I go to the bathroom?" I ask him as he nods and tells me to go. As soon as I get there I lock the door and pull my sleeves up. As I look at them, I see all the scars I've done to myself. I want to stop, but I can't. I have to be punished.

I get the small blade I always have in my pocket and cut, again, again, and again. Deeper than ever, bigger. I let the tears fall, as the red liquid spills out of my arm. I clean the blood but before I get out of the bathroom I get light headed and faint. I'm so weak.