It's A Lonely World//Rickyl~Daryl x Rick~Rick x Daryl

Lose Yourself

We had just lost Lori in the child birth, and Rick was broken. I know *we* have feelings for each other, but he loved Lori with all of his heart, and all I could do was watch as he crumbled to the ground, Maggie crying to Glenn with blood on her hands, and a baby in her arms, and Carl holding a gun, looking at the floor.

*He...He shot her...*

I finally placed my crossbow down, walking over to Carl and kneeling down, lifting his head up and staring into his eyes.

"Hey. It's all gonna be alright, I promise."

"I...I-I had to do it...I-I had to..."

I pulled him into a hug, where he started crying on my shoulder.
"It's alright." I whispered.
"It's all gonna be okay Carl, it's all gonna be okay. I promise."

"I didn't-want-to, D-Daryl...I didn't want to..."

"Shh, I know. Your mother loved you very much, but you did the right thing. She was sufferin', and you made sure she didn't have to anymore. She's in a safe place now, watchin' over all of us, makin' sure we're alright. Everythin's gonna be okay Carl."

"...Thank you Daryl, thank you."

"You're welcome Buddy-"

"I love you, Daryl." He cried, making me tense up.

"I...I love you too, Carl."

I lifted my head off of his shoulder, watching as Rick got up, storming into the building, and Maggie calling after him to stop.

I looked back over at Carl, placing my hands on his shoulders.
"Carl, stay here alright?"

"Where are you going?"

"I'm gonna go get your dad."

He nodded.
"Please don't die."

I smiled.
"I wont."

I stood up, grabbing my crossbow and jogging inside. Right as I got into the building, I spotted hundreds of corpses with hatchet marks in their heads.

"Rick!" I called out, walking over the bodies.
"Rick!"

I walked into a room, spotting a puddle of blood with chunks in it, and my heart was beating out of my chest.

"R-Rick?"

I stepped into the room, following the trail of blood around the corner until I spotted Rick repeatedly stabbing a bloated zombie in the stomach.

"Rick."

He stabbed again.

"Rick!"

He kept on stabbing.

"RICK!"

He finally stopped, falling onto his back and balling his eyes out. I ran over to him, sitting him up and placing his head on my shoulder, running my fingers through his hair as I felt his tears seep through my shirt.

"Shh, shh. It's okay. She's in a safe place now, away from harm. She's safe Rick. Everythin'll be okay."

"It-It's all my fault. I keep leaving her a-and I feel like she thinks that I love you more than her...b-but I love her so much..."

"It's not your fault. It's hard to raise kids in this world, but look at how you're doin' with Carl. He's almost as good as you. It'll all be alright..."

"B-But Daryl...she-she's my w-wife...why would I cheat on her?"

"I know she's your wife. It's my fault, I was just desperate, and you've already helped me, and loved me more than my whole family combined. It's all my fault. Take it out on me, I'm used to it."

"W-Why would I do that to her? I didn't even get to say sorry...I didn't get to say how much I loved her...I didn't even g-get to say, g-goodbye..."

"Rick...stop blaming it on yourself. It's all my fault, cause I was lonely, and I always have been. I'm so sorry my stupidity lead to the loss of the most important woman in your life. Take it out on me. Beat me, yell at me, just do what you need to do."

He pulled out of the hug, staring into my eyes.
"I would never do that to you."

"Just do it. Use me as a punchin' bag. Do what you need to do to stop cryin'. Just punch me, slap me, anythin'."

He stood up, and I stood up with him, closing my eyes and awaiting the pain that I was about to be in.