His Safe Haven

1.

As she sat in the sterile confines of the hospital room, her senses became acutely aware of the surroundings. The distinct scent of antiseptic and disinfectant lingered in the air, mingling with the very faint smell of freshly laundered linens. It was an environment and smell she was very familiar with. The rhythmic beeping of the heart rate monitor echoed through the room, a constant but annoying reminder of life's fragile balance, a reminder that death was just at the door waiting for a chance to come in.

Each beep from the heart rate monitor resonated within her, a symphony of anticipation and apprehension. As she closed her tired eyes, she could almost feel the weight of her own tattered heart, beating in tandem with the machine, a delicate dance between vulnerability and resilience. Fear and hope. Life and death. At this moment, amidst the all too familiar clinical surroundings, she found solace and strength, knowing that every beat was a testament to her unwavering spirit and the love that compelled her forward.

A chill ran down her spine as she continued to hold the medical report in her trembling hands. Her eyes traced the words that revealed a deep secret no one knew about her. A secret buried in the chambers of her heart ever since she was a kid. A truth she wanted to run away from because she was not strong enough to accept it with open arms and acknowledge the fact that death could come for her at any time, anywhere.

Human beings were indeed the strongest creatures with the most fragile hearts. One heartbreak, one disease, one gunshot... sufficient to stop the heart from beating and supplying life to the rest of the body.

In bold words, the medical reports confirmed that the small device, a pacemaker, residing in her chest was not only depleting of battery but was also failing to help her heart beat at a normal rate and rhythm. The pacemaker, the device keeping her alive, was not helping her heart pump blood effectively to her body.

Her heart was failing... once again.

For the second time in her life.

Now, everything become crystal clear. Shortness of breath, weakness in the body, loss of appetite, and irregular heartbeats. It was her body telling her to stop and seek medical help before it was too late. Ever since that incident 19 years ago, her healthy body was left in ruins. She would often wake up crying and screaming in the middle of the night because the shadows kept haunting her day and night. They never left her, they were always there beside her and residing somewhere in the back of her mind.

With small and timid steps, Jannat walked to the bathroom in her hospital room and closed the door behind her. Unbeknownst to her, her feet took her to stand right in front of the mirror where she saw her reflection. Dull and extremely tired green eyes, once so full of joy, now bore traces of loneliness, sorrow, pain, and fatigue. It is often said, "The eyes are the windows to the soul." Jannat's eyes carried the weight of her burdens, haunted by constant nightmares and blurry memories she could neither recall nor forget.

Contrasting exquisitely with her emerald gaze, her pitch-black hair cascaded down her back in waves and a tangled mess. Each strand seemed to possess a hint of hope she still had in her heart regarding her health. The darkness of her hair served as a striking contrast against her sickly pale and porcelain skin. The skin that once held an ethereal glow now resembled snow, so pale and so delicate.

Her tear-brimmed gaze drifted downwards to her chest which was visible through the open buttons of her hospital gown, towards the gunshot scar that sat right on top of her heart. It was like a neon sign, always glowing to serve as a painful reminder of that fateful night, a night she had little to no memories of anymore. A reminder of that bullet that had pierced her innocent heart as a young child. The trauma was so great, it wiped away all her memories except the pain and the scar.