Code Name : Catherine

Chapter 10

        I found myself behind the steering wheel of the car this time. I held tight on it - almost as hard as I was trying to hold all my emotions in. I couldn't believe that I had just met Michael's family. The fact that I had been enjoying their company, and they had been enjoying mine, made the pain in my heart that much worse.

        It didn't even make sense to me in my head. The fact that it was such a coincidence made it creepier - I was on the run and bumped into the past of the person that had started this whole ordeal for me. It truly was a small world, smaller than anyone could anticipate.

        I tried to connect Marsha and Jemma to Michael but I just couldn't see how they'd fit. Michael was a hardcore gangster. He never mentioned having a sister or a family in general. He didn't even have a hint of a country-like accent. How had he become so bad when he came from a family that polite, caring and sweet?

        "If you think any harder I'll start hearing your thoughts, Catherine." Nick didn't look at me; instead he was staring at his cellphone, typing away on the screen. He sat so casually in the seat next to mine, with his feet resting on the dashboard and he didn't have a seat-belt on - which I'm sure was pretty illegal.

        "Put a damn seat-belt on, Nick." I spat angrily. I didn't know why I was angry, I just was.

        "Okay, sorry," he sat up properly in his seat, "I just got in the car so fast and wasn't in the mood to be in a car seat yet."

        I heard the blaming and underlying enquiry in his statement. It angered me more than I already was. I swerved the car and parked on the side of the road. I knew I was acting hastily when I unbuckled my seat belt and left the car screaming, "Go to hell!"

        I starting running back in the direction of the motel with tears in my eyes. I could feel the fact that I hadn't gone jogging in a while. Nevertheless I kept going. Something inside me told me that I should tell Marsha about Sean, that I should stop hiding from my mistakes. That I should just give myself in to the cops, get Sean arrested and possibly get arrested or killed myself - the bigger picture is that I'd be free from all the hiding and running.

        My eyes were burning from the tears that wanted so badly to escape but I wasn't letting out. I just kept running as fast as I could, ignoring the burning in my chest and muscles.

        "Catherine!" I heard Nick shout behind me and chose not to respond.

        I noticed the car driving beside me and Nick looking at me while sitting in the driver's seat. Still, I didn't stop running. I was fueled by pure determination.

        "Catherine, get in the car," Nick pleaded. His request went unanswered, "Catherine, just please get in the car. I'm sorry!"

        I stopped in my tracks. The car carried on forwards and parked about four meters from where I stood. It amazed me how Nick would apologise for something he didn't do. I was the one throwing tantrums and jumping out of cars, he didn't even know why, yet there he had been - apologising.

        Nick got out the car and ran towards me. I felt a pang of guilt when I noticed him in his pajama pants. I was the first to speak. Regret and remorse filled my every word. Not just for throwing the tantrum but for everything that had happened, "I'm sorry!"

        Nick showed me affection, something he hadn't done since we had left New York. He pulled me in his arms and hushed me, tenderly kissing my forehead, "It's okay, love. It's gonna be okay."

        I looked up at him with tear-stained cheeks and marveled at his calming ability. He placed a tender kiss on my lips before licking his own and laughing.