Regret

Their Side

Hi Karen, I accidentaly saw your diary---I mean your letter for us. Anyway, this is Kyle, the one you believed who have ruined everything.

So how did that happened? It was sunny morning when your friends and I pay a visit at your home, Including Trisha. Your friends said they missed you. And pumunta ako to settle things between the two of us. I know you, Karen. You were just acting tough, but I know what's inside those facade, I know deeply that you're crying in pain. Kilalang-kilala kita more than anyone else.

Believe me, Karen. Hindi ako nananadya when I also brought Trisha. Ayoko na ng gulo, ayoko na ng gap. I wanted to fix everything that happened before entering into a romantic relationship with your friend. Because honestly, I found the lady to devote my whole life with. I love her better than the way I used to loved you.

Your mother handed us a small notebook with a smile. Nagtataka naman ako habang inaabot ko ito.

"She went to US to study." Sinabi nya saamin with a smile. But those were fake. Nagulat kami, of course. Sinabi nga din nyang 1 month ago na pala simula ng umalis ka. Nanginginig ako that time, muntik ko ng mabitawan yung notebook, I know I am also the reason why you left.

Hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko that time. Until your mother taps my back and handed me a tissue. I did not know na may luha na palang bumagsak. "You'll find the answer there." Turo nya sa notebook saka umalis.

Ayaw na ayaw kong buksan yung notebook. I'm afraid to see what pain you have gone through because of us. But I set aside all those fears and manage to do so. 'Pagbabasa lang hindi ko pa magawa? Paano pa kayang ikaw na nasasaktan' was my mantra to open the notebook.

And there, we've seen by the way you write to your diary how wrecked you have been. The diary was pure of lamentations and regret.

And so, to free ourself from guilt and remorse we write a letter addressing to you.

1st letter,

Karen, we really did not know how to start this letter. Maybe we should start by saying 'sorry?' But on the second hand, we take it back. Sorry isnt enough for the pain we've caused you. Masyadong madaming masasakit na bagay without being aware kaming nagawa sayo. And we've realized one thing, no matter how cliche this quote is, 'you'll never know the true value of one person unless they're gone'.

Sa ating magkakaibigan, ikaw yung pinaka malakas. Ikaw yung pinaka matapang. So we did not bother to take a look at you. But we didnt know that all of that were just disguise! We remember one time, we are nagging you, ang kulit kasi ni Kyle. Parang obssessed na sayo, kami yung kinukulit nya para makapag usap kayo. Iritang irita kami talaga nun sainyo. And you just smiled and said 'I love the way he is' sabi mo with a smile. And we've seen from those small, brown eyes how deeply you fell in love with each other. We did not reprimand you because we can see how you really love him. Why would we take away our friends' happiness?

Then we remember, nung nag break kayo ni Kyle. Napaka casual mo noon. Parang walang nangyari. Mukha ka pa ding masaya pero may kulang. Napansin namin yung kulang. Blanko yung mga mata mo parati. Pero hindi na namin pinansin, baka kasi nag hahaluccinate lang kami.

We were shocked nung malaman namin na after just 3 weeks of your break up, naging sila ni Trish. Pero nakabawi kami sa gulat. Una, why would we care about what you feel eh mukha ka namang masaya. Second, like you, why would we take away our Trish' happiness? Dati diba tinanong ka namin kung okay lang kayo ni Kyle, we were not suppose to ask you that time. But we asked, just for formality.

Si Trish kasi yung medyo kailangan ng gabay sa atin that's why we are reprimanding her about her relationship with Kyle. Na si Kyle yung badass type. Hindi ka na namin pinaalalahanan because all we know is you're clever enough to notice it.