Lean on Me

15

*Arizona*

The clock showed 6:38. Where the hell was I? I wasn't at home and I wasn't at my dorm. Opening my eyes up all the way I see a female body night to me. I looked down and saw I had a tank top on and shorts.

"Nice to see you're awake." She said.

"Jo? Why am I here? What happened?" I started to panic.

"You don't remember do you?" She asked turning to me.

"I really don't so why don't you tell me."

"Ok, you came in here balling your eyes out and I gave you some stuff to help with your pain and then you got hella drunk and you went to sleep."

"So we didn't have sex?"

She bursted out laughing. "Stef, I'm straight, and you have a girlfriend you should probably talk to."

"Can I stay here for a little bit though?"

"Of course." She left the room and into the kitchen.

Jo is 4 years older than me and has been a good outlet for me. We've snuck into clubs together and she lets me drink all different kinds of booze when I need it. It's not like she just gives it to me though. I have mental breakdowns sometimes and she helps me.

Then my memory started to come back. I remember crying as soon as Lena had left. When she said she was sick I should have just let her go. She has a bruise on her arm thanks to me. One of my close friends Maggie texted me telling me about a party that Mark was hosting and I would want to go with Lena to make it up to her. Lena probably hates me and probably wants nothing to do with me now and it's all my fault. Great.

Each semester my family takes a trip back to Italy to see my grandparents so I doubt I'll be able to take Lena to this frat party. She has no idea that I'll be gone for the whole 2 weeks.

Would it be better to call her or text her? If I called her I got an instant answer and reaction, but the silence could be deadly. I chose to text her.

Me: Hey, is there any chance we could get coffee this morning?

I hesitated hitting send. This could go all wrong and Lena could break up with me today. I should prepare for the worst and hope for the best.
Then my phone went off.

L 💍: Our usual spot in 30 minutes?
Me: Perfect.

I explained to Jo was happened in under a minute and I was on the road going 10 miles over the speed limit so I could get their on time.

I got back to the door with 20 minutes to spare. I got into the shower and threw on a shirt and ripped jeans. Maybe I should get all of my crying out now so I don't have to cry right in the coffee shop. Getting back onto the road I parked next to Lena's car. I was only 6 minutes late.

"I thought you ditched me." She said greeting me with a short side hug. Maybe I am completely friend zoned.

"Sorry, I take long showers."

There was a lot of silence until I decided to say something.

"I'm sorry." We said in unison.

"You're sorry?" We said again in unison.

"You go first." We said together once again.

"When you said you were sick I should have just told you "I hope you feel better" and gone on with my life."

"Baby no, I yelled at you and I didn't say goodbye to you or your moms and it was your birthday, I really am a terrible person." She looked like she was about to cry.

I grabbed her hand from across the table. "It was still the best birthday weekend ever."

"I hope you don't hate me, I'm really sorry." She was saying sorry a lot like she did something wrong, she got really sick and I didn't like that.

"There's actually something I need to talk to you about though." How was she going to react to me leaving her for 2 weeks.

"No, you actually are going to break up with me, I told you I'm sorry." She was almost begging.

"I'm not going to leave you, I'd be crazy to leave you Lena. It's actually something else. So every semester my family goes to Italy to visit my grandparents."

She just looked at me dead in the eyes. "How long will you be gone?"

"The whole 2 weeks, I don't know if you heard about Mark's party but I'm leaving that Sunday morning."

The silence was thick as neither of us knew what to say. Was she mad or sad? I've known her for 6 months and this was the one time I couldn't read her emotions.

"Lena...say something."

Silence.

"Do you really think this is the best for us?" She asked.

"Yes and no. Maybe we need a break from each other, not that we have to break up but you deserve two weeks without worrying about me."

"I don't want two weeks without you though."