Gold Heart, Warm Soul

1| Prologue: Second chance

I was in coma for 6 months before I woke up. It was a miracle for me to survive the car accident as my life depended on a machine for me to survive while I was unconscious. My mother who loved me dearly did not want to pull the life support and let me die, so she convinced the doctor to let me be in a vegetative state. A miracle to be perfectly fine after I woke up.

A fragile miracle, I would say. Even if I woke up, I knew that I would only have 5 years left to live. I would know because I had relive the same life again after the accident. This was my second life. I had restarted my time when I woke up from the coma. However, it has a time limit.

The nurses were surprise to see me awake, bawling my eyes out. It was surreal to me. After all, I had experience dying once my five years was up. I made the wrong decisions trying to pursue my love. In my first life, I believed that true love was I what I need for 5 years of my remaining time. A true love kiss was what I need to wake up from the nightmare that I was dying. What I got in return in my first life was oblivion, darkness and emptiness. No Prince Charming sweeping me off from my feet. No knight in shining armour saving me from the high tower. All I left was the rags I have on me when I departed from the world.

Now that I was back, I decided to take back what is righteously mine. Forget true love. It isn't worth a penny. Who cares if I was gonna die again. I don't want to experience oblivion again. I don't want my existence to be forgotten. What I want is to make my mark on the world. To be the hero who is remembered by the people, instead of being the supporting role where they are forgotten.

As the nurses calmed me down, I kept my emotions in check while they called for my family. My family includes my parents and my older brother. I regret that I wasn't close to my brother in my previous life. In this new life, I want to have a good relationship with my brother. Also, I made a list of things I want to do and change in my head, so I wrote a bucket list.

I want to have abetter relationship with my brother and my parents.

I want to graduate from university.

I want to travel around the world and experience the things I could not do in my previous life.

I want to look at the sunset and just soak up the moment until I could even remember the beautiful scene in my sleep.

I want to get revenge on those who made me feel small and unworthy. 

I want to get a job, earn my own money and focused on self-love.

I want to eat everything I love. Try different kinds of food that I haven't tried.

I want to live my life to the fullest. I want to enjoy it.

I just want to be normal. Feel normal. Be normal.

I don't want to have any regrets anymore. I closed my eyes and drift off to sleep, hoping I wasn't in a dream where god is playing tricks on me.