Gold Heart, Warm Soul

20| I can't feel the pain

As Felicia walked towards the priestess to be seated at the acupuncture table, Lou Shaotian got up from the male section of the hall and accompanied her. Felicia's hand trembled slightly as the priestess instructed to placed her arm on the cushion. The golden needles were already prepared on the table, ready to prick Felicia's skin. I could see Felicia's face getting paler as the priestess held a needle ready to start the cleansing acupuncture. By her side, Lou Shaotian whispered words of comfort to soothe Felicia's fear. As I looked at the couple, I could not help to envy them. They had one another. Something I could not be able to achieve in my past life and something I will not ever have. From ancient stories, it is said that all of us are tied with a red string to our fated ones. Although some say it was a myth, I believe it hundred percent because in my previous life, I could see the string when I was dying. At the last moment when my life force was ending, I could see the red string stuck onto my mother's finger with my dad. I could see the red string on my brother's finger that leads to somewhere or someone. Everyone is tied to a red string. However, the red strings could snap if you had gone through a devastation. For example, if your loved ones had died. There are other colour of strings too. Yellow for family and Blue for friends. In my past life, I could not see any red string on my finger nor any blue strings. You could say I don't have a fated one and I don't have friends. In this life, I'm sure I have blue and yellow strings. Although I can't see the strings of relationship anymore as I am not a death's door, I'm sure my red string is not tied to Titus or anyone else for the matter. I sigh. I scolded myself internally. I should not think of negative thoughts. I have a promise to fulfilled to myself. I have to prioritise on myself and not repeat my past mistakes again.

I could feel a hand on my shoulder and I turned around to see eyes filled with worry. "Are you alright, you looked like you were lost in thoughts," Ethan gently said with concern. "I'm fine. I was just thinking of past memories," I said sadly trying to hid my emotions from my face. Even though I could have sworn that I kept my emotions in check, my tone of voice had made Ethan more worried. "A penny for your thoughts, maybe?" Ethan asked trying to coax me to talk to him about my problems. "Someday," I promised him. Murmurings from the hall broke our conversation. In the front of the hall, I could see tears running down Felicia's beautiful face while Lou Shaotian calmly held her hand and wiped off her tears. A white piece of cloth was placed in Felicia's mouth to keep her from grinding her teeth and help her to cope with the pain. Sweat was forming onto Felicia's back and I could tell she was having a hard time. "Aren't you scared? I hate being the last for anything," Ethan said diverting my attention. "Anxious, Yes. Scared? I don't think so," I replied him. "Well, both of us are the youngest here, so we've always been the last for any family events," Ethan said. "True. We're partners in crime, aren't we?" I cheekily said with a smile on my face. Ethan's face softens and he nodded bring up his fist towards me. I fist bumped him.

Once 15 minutes was up, it was my turn. The priestess called me over, and also  informed 5 males to start with their cleansing ceremony as I would take awhile to finish. I had to do double the time compared to other women. I walked calmly and sat at the left hand side of the priestess. From across the room, I could see my brother cheering for me which made me giggled. "Well, aren't you a bright one," the priestess commented as she clean the needles and took out a new batch of needles to use on me. I smiled at her, "I guess."  The way the priestess handled herself was elegant as she did not waste any movements. "Place your arm on the cushion please and I was notified that you are to do the acupuncture on both arms since you missed the ceremony last year," the priestess said. I listened to her instructions. She first checked my pulse and took out a set of 30 needles. "Alright, I'm going to start with your first session," the priestess once again said. I could see the wrinkle on her face but she aged beautifully. I can't helped to admire her timeless beauty. I was caught staring at her and sheepishly smiled. There was quite a commotion in the hall, as five males was ushered to the courtyard to receive their lashings, but many still remained to witness my ceremony.

With a gentle hand, the priestess inserted a needle into my skin. I could feel a sharp prick, but not the pain I had imagined. She continued her practice, while I curiously studied her skill. Since I did not have much reaction to the acupuncture, the priestess quickly pricked my skin with needles with high precision. She aimed at the spots on the arm that was close to my vital points but I could tell there were some side effects including reducing my fatigue and improving blood circulation. Also the whole process was making me drowsy. Seating in the comfortable chair and the cooling breeze blowing towards me, made me sleepy. I tried to suppress a yawn, but to no avail. Once the priestess had already placed 15 needles in my arm, she stopped for a moment to dip the rest of the needles with freshly brewed tradition medicine.

"Don't you feel any pain, child?" the priestess asked me. "Not really, I could only feel pricks here and there," I replied. "Hmm, is that so. I had only treated one other woman who did not feel tremendous pain during my treatment," the priestess said. I could see the priestess was reminiscing the past. "Who would that be? And is it normal? Not to feel much pain, I mean," I asked the priestess carefully so that I would not overstep my boundaries. "She was a great woman. I don't think you would know her. She was Lady An. The concubine of King Tian of the last dynasty of this country. And to answer your question child, it is perfectly normal to not feel pain during my treatments."

As I soaked into her reply, I realised only one other woman had the same experience I was having right now. On what basis, is that normal? "I can see your question on your face, young lady," the priestess said knowingly as she placed another needle into my skin. "There's a saying. A person who had felt a multitude of pain and sadness, would not think a sword through the heart as painful. He would rejoice because the pain made him feel alive." As the priestess finished saying the sentence, she too had finally finished her first session on me. I looked down on my arm and I was surprised to see some blood trickling down to my clothes. Some of my skin had turned blue-black because of the needles. "So you mean, I don't feel the pain because I had far worse experiences?"

"Precisely, child. Now come on, face towards me, I have to remove the needles and wrap your arm with gauze." I turned towards the priestess and patiently waited for her to remove all the needles from my arm. Then she wiped my arm clean of blood and apply a stinging balm onto my skin before carefully wrapped in white gauze to prevent it from infection. "Right, now we're going to do your other arm."