Broken Screens

Chapter 8

"Heads up" I was quickly shaken from my thoughts as I saw a basketball slam into the wall next to my head. Without saying anything I threw the basketball away from me and went back to my juice box. After finishing it I quickly got up and threw it away in the locker room. Risking a glance up I saw myself in the mirror for the first time that morning.

I look terrible

I moved closer to the mirror to examine my face more closely, my eyes were red and puffy like I had slept for days. My hair was messy and thrown haphazardly into a bun. My clothes were messy and wrinkled. I looked like absolute shit, and it showed. I felt water splash my hand. I looked up to see I had started crying again. Quickly brushing away the tears I stood up and walked away from the mirrors.

"Julia?" I jumped back upon hearing Millie call my name

"coming," I say quickly running back into the gym. I look around trying to find my team, running over after I spot them I sit down on the sideline and put my hood up. Suddenly I see a shadow over me. I look up to see an angry Brad,

He looks about as menacing as a butterfly stuck to a marshmallow.

"Julia it's your turn to sub," he says above me. Before I have a chance to respond Millie speaks up

"No, it's not,"

"Yes it is," Brad turns towards Millie

"She has to play" I cringe, hearing myself be called "she"

Please stop arguing over me

Look what you've done, you just create problems

No, I don't this isn't my fault, I just can't play right now.

This is your fault, you are being selfish.

"Its fine ill play" I get up and walk towards the basketball lying on the floor,

"No Julia it's fine I didn't know, you can sit out," Brad says looking down

"Alright" I drop the basketball and slide down the wall to the ground

Fuck life

I get up and quickly run to the locker rooms ignoring the pain in my arms and chest, ignoring my vision blurred by tears, ignoring the concerned looks.

{Might be Triggering}

Ignoring every negative thought trying to push its way into my head, clawing at my brain trying to "Help". Ignoring the voice that's convinced me so many times it's ok. Ignoring the voice of reason I sit in the showers again and rip off my jacket and stare at my arms. Covered in angry red lines from last night.

"f-fuck" my voice comes out shaky, I hate it, how weak I sound. I stare at the lines, debating whether to add more or leave them be before I can decide I hear the voices of girls fill the room signaling gym was over.

{Triggering scene over}

I quickly put my sweatshirt back on and walk out of the lockers, Ignoring the concerned voices of my friends I grab my things and walk out of the locker room, with one thing on my mind,

I have to find Ava.