thank you, text // MAMAMOO

consequences

Wheein didn't truly know the consequences to her actions, or maybe she did, yet she did not fully understand them. It took 3 missed calls and 11 missed texts from Hyejin for Wheein to snap once again and threaten to block her number if she didn't stop texting her. Sure it She didn't really know why she started to feel like she needed to stop being so close to Hyejin, but here she was, thinking of ways to avoid her without it seeming obvious. What she had done would have no doubt hurt the younger girl but she didn't know the full effect of her wrong-doings just yet.

That night, was probably the hardest for her. She walked in to a silent house and a sticky note posted on the fridge in her best friend's all to familiar scrawl.

'Gone out for the night, I realized you needed space. I'll be back in the morning,'

The pang in her heart and the sudden drop in her stomach urged her to call the girl, to tell her she needed Hyejin and for her to come back and hold her like she did every night. Yet the logical thinking of her brain urged her to keep going, to keep ignoring her, and that this was right.

    She ripped the sticky note off the fridge before unceremoniously crumbling it up and throwing it in the trash.  "I don't care, I really don't." Wheein muttered to herself over and over again. Maybe if she said it enough times, she would be absolutely sure it was true.

    Wheein felt the tears in her eyes, welling up and threatening to fall. She crumpled on the ground in their shared kitchen and rather meekly and pathetically lied there, staring at the ceiling. She fought back her tears, knowing this was all silly. There hadn't been a fight between the two girls in years, and she had just decided to start one. She had forgotten how much she had always been effected by the girl, positively and negatively.

    Usually, on the rare occasions they would disagree enough to have a fight, it was never Wheein on the offending side. Yes, she put in her fair share of biting back and giving sly remarks, but she never caused it all. Instead it was usually a mutual misunderstanding, or Hyejin being protective over her and her not having it. This time, she was the one causing a mess, over nothing.

    Always, she had been one for being a little overdramatic with the people she cared about. Wheein was always empathetic, kind at heart. Never did she want to hurt someone who mattered to her the most especially now.

    Many of the things Yongsun-unnie and other people had said to her that were marinating in her head for a while finally resurfaced. Overanalyzing even the simplest of phrases. Sure, she had always been the closest of friends with Hyejin, but she hadn't considered they were "too close". Identifying as bisexual was also never an issue between the two of them, it didn't cross their minds that Wheein could possibly develop feelings for Hyejin. Hyejin acted rather gay, even though she would deny it to no end. However wanting to be with someone forever doesn't mean you like them romantically. It just means you want to be with them until the end of time. Nothing more, nothing less.

    Even with all of this self-reflection, Wheein couldn't help but feel she was ignoring something. Maybe she did want to kiss Hyejin sometimes a little more than they should have. In American TV shows they used to watch growing up, they used to see girls kissing. They would still stay friends and it would be find. "Experimenting", yeah, maybe Wheein wanted to do that with her. If Hyejin even thought about her in that way. She had her opinions that maybe she didn't seemas she said she was. Just like everyone else did. However she never pressured her or teased her endlessly for it like all of friends did.

Quickly, she shook of these thoughts and pulled out her phone. She unlocked it and quickly went to her messages. She nearly subconsciously went to text one person in particular. Wheein's thumb hovered over the contact name, before scrolling past it. She opened another app and started playing some dumb mobile game. Anything to pass the time, she figured. Though a few moments later, she got a text from someone she didn't normally talk to.

chung ha:
uh why did hyejin unnie come to my doorstep crying??

wheein unnie:
what??? she's at your place?? what happened?

chung ha:
That's what I'm asking you.

wheein unnie:
I have no idea. When I got home there was a note on the fridge saying she was going to be out for the night, how was supposed to know?

chung ha:
You're the only person she would cry over, just saying. Now tell me what happened.

wheein unnie:
something personal. why did she go to your house though?

chung ha:
hyejin said she didn't want to bother any of your friends.
now tell me why she's so sad

wheein unnie:
I told you it's something personal.

chung ha:
if that's the case then, I won't bother. It's up to you to decide what's more important, you telling me and letting your guard down in the slightest or hyejin staying upset for even longer.

    To this, she didn't know what she could say. Neither had she made up her mind nor had she even thought about it. The fact that she was being selfish terrified her. Being seen as something like that made her feel awful. Her personality was sort of like a paradox. She was open to others but not truly open. Wheein was sensitive and sweet, and old soul, but she was also cold and cut off at times, not thinking of others. No, she didn't have anything wrong with her, it was just the way she was. Now, of all times, was the worst time to have this personality. She was always indecisive when it came to these things, never knowing what to do or where to go. Her emotions overwhelmed her so she would just keep quiet when anything bad would happen, no matter how unhealthy it could be. For this situation, the vocalist would have to own up to it. Yet, her feelings held her back. The most evident thing was that she needed to make up her mind, or the damage could be even worse for her.

A/N: Once again,, sorry this isn't very good. I'm halfway across the US rn, but I still wanted to update. Be sure to tell me your thoughts ~