Everything is going to shit and I hate it. I wish I could make you feel better but I just end up making things worst.
Sometimes I think that everyone would be better off without me but how could I be so selfish to leave behind the people that love me.. even if I feel as if no one does I know some does. I can't make things better. It sucks. It really sucks.
I thought I understood and since you were going through things that I wouldn't come to you with my selfish, dumbass problems but that wasn't the answer. So what is the answer?
I feel like things are on thin ice and I don't want it to be. Not now, not ever.
Every thing I do ends badly.
I'm sorry I came into your life and made you feel things and realize things and show you how love is. You were perfectly fine without me before just doing your own thing then I came in and fucked that up. Even though you was fucking with the wrong folks anyways😂😂. I'm such a destroyer. You're probably better off without me. I don't want to believe that but I feel like I'm not help anyone.
It's just selfishness on top of selfishness. Not to mention the insecurities I have, and my problem with being clingy.
I should just die. I'm doing no good to anyone here. I'm a burden on everyone🤦🏽♀️. I had reasons to stay here on earth and live but I fucked up every reason I had.
But for some odd reason I can't get enough strength to pick up the razor that's waiting for me... Calling out to me just wanting me to slit my wrist. I'm holding myself back.
But.
I'm afraid my demons might win this fight..
