:(: ~ you decide

Five

I hate this feeling. 

Its so familiar. 

Its an old friend, that I hate when it comes knocking. 

Im not a stranger but more like a dear friend to it. 

How come I keep losing everyone I trust?

How come they all turn on me?

What did I do?

Why wont they tell me?

Why is it that the more I let onto my life, the more that leaves my life?

I hate losing my friends..

It hurts yet I smile and pretend it doesnt hurt nor does it bother me. 

I simply say "It doesnt really affect me, Ive been waiting for this for a long time now" with a nice warm and bright smile. 

-no one understands me