How come we are so foolish?

Movement, sickness dependence and vulnerablity

I broke my leg, or rather tear my muscle, I don't know exactly.

It is so absolutely tiring.

And I remember exactly how before it happened, I was already tired and there where multiple signs of me probably needing to stop.                                                                                                                    Jumping wasn't fun anymore, and my legs shoke more at each turbulence.

I had to think about my friend who always ends up with either broken legs or arms in all kinds of moments. And about that one horribly dangerous curve I had at the last moment managed to safe.

So I thought:

"I can't really manage another one"

"nah, who cares nothing too bad or dramatic is gonna happen"

and probably somewhere even deeper inside my mind I thought

"not to me because nothing ever happens to me"

"Well if I'm careful and go the easier way on that one curve it'll be ok"

And I went slower, my legs still trembled and before I knew it I was hooked on the wrong way looked back to the right one that I had already missed without noticing, because the wrong one had been used so many times now that it became the main one

and I lost control and fell.

So I can't stop thinking, what if I had just listened to myself?

I was doing so good before, why couldn't I just be careful?

Now I can't even shower on my own.

my god.                                                                                                                                  

THIS IS HORRIBLE

And since I'm writing this on my first day with a disabelled leg I bet it'll get better, but still I have to give my credit and respect to all of those who are hoplessly dependent but don't have a choice despite their will, for reasons beyond their reach.

To everyone who's sick.

To everyone without legs.

To everyone vulnerable.

To everyone.

Stay safe kids and don't shrug what your body tells you off, because you don't get a second one.

:'3