⤷ HIS HEART WAS BEATING out of his chest. he was nervous, to say the least. it was now thursday and the lump hasn't left his throat since sunday. his life has been an endless full schedule of wallowing in his own self pity and disgust. no matter how many showers he took, he couldn't seem to wash the blonde girls scent from off of him which left him feeling both angry and dirty. despite his self hate, nothing could amount to what flora felt.
the night she saw him was the night her heart shattered into a million pieces. the boy she had given and devoted her heart to for three years was kissing another girl. for three years she has supported, loved, and cared for blake only for him to throw it all away. it seemed as though it was all meaningless to him. for four whole days she later in bed, crying her eyes out and mentally killing herself. she barely got up to eat, only ever needing to use the restroom once a day because of the lack of both food and water intake. she was finally going to see him in front of her after five months, eight days, and six hours. she was nervous, of course, it was a difficult and awkward to discuss. but she knew she had to do it, for both his and her sake.
she looked out her window to the boy, eyes sore from crying so much. he stared up at her, hands in his pockets to prevent himself from twiddling his thumbs. it was something that always bothered her. flora decided to man up and walk down to him. she was still wearing the rubber ducky pajama pants and cropped sweater from that night. with one last breath, the girl opened her front door before cautiously walking towards her now ex boyfriend. blakes breath hitched as she approached him. even with her face red and puffy and her hair all knotted into a bun, she still managed to look perfect. he was sure he didn't look any better, but god did she look beautiful.
"tik tok." she said, arms folded as her sore throat almost choked out a cry. she wondered how he could still manage to smell so good at a time like this, or how his hair was still perfectly messy. he just looked at her stupidly, not knowing what to say. "i-i" he managed to choke out, words being trapped by the lump. he stepped closer to the girl, who didn't budge. if he were to kiss her right now, would that be bad? he thought so, so he pushed the thought away. "flora, i truly do love you." he said, looking down to her smaller girl. tears balanced themselves on her lash line but she didn't dare cry in front of him, not now anyways. his cologne was aggravatingly comforting, the slight minty undertone setting itself into her sweater. she was close enough to hug him. "blake, what do you expect? me to just forgive you? what you did was horrible, no, atrocious. i trusted you, blake. i have you my heart. i devoted myself to you for three fucking years and this is what i get in return?" she blurted out, beginning to shake with both anxiety and anger. how could one boy comfort yet cause so much anxiety for the girl. he couldn't look at her, knowing that if he did he'd just hurt more in the long run. "i need you to understand that i'm sorry, and it was a stupid stupid mistake. i'm sorry for making you feel unappreciated or not important in my life. the last thing i ever want to do is belittle you. flora, you created such an impact on my life," he sighed, running a shaky hand through his hair and slight tugging on some strands. "i wouldn't be who i am without you. trust me when i say that. i'm sorry i got so caught up on tour that i forgot about the one who made it possible." tears had started flowing from both of their eyes. seeing her like this, and knowing he caused it, broke blake's heart completely. flora finally looked up to him, her bright blue eyes alarming him as streams flowed out from them. "blake," she was scared to touch his face, but did so anyways. "you were the best thing that's ever happened to me. but i cant just be your second choice anymore. i get it, music is your life. but i just can't deal with what you put me through for so long again. it's clear you've made your choice." his heart broke more with every word. this was real, it was happening. his entire world was crumbling. blake would've done anything to keep her, but he decided not to try. his stupid, reckless actions cost him the most important thing in his life. flora turned to leave, seeing as the conversation was finish. before she could leave completely, he grabbed her hand. it was still soft. the girl whipped her head around, eyes wild as her heart cried. "flora, i-" he choked on tears, not wanting to finish his sentence that he felt needed to be said. "i love you."
