AIM

19

I was so lost in the disbelief that namjoon or anyone here knows who my father is, and why they would know, and why they would be contacting him in the first place, what did he have to do with anything, what significance would telling my father about me have anything to do with them.

through the loud disturbance in my mind, I hadn't noticed anyone arriving back from the case. until I heard someone standing behind me.

"what are you doing?" namjoon's cold voice hung over me.

I turned slowly around to face his straight face, his eyes falling onto the screen, filling with worry...

"namjoon... what are you doing talking to my father?"

he stood there, wide eyed with nothing to say. his angry exterior melting away as he realises what I've found. he knows its out there, whatever this was, whatever was going on, I had found out; and there was no way he was getting out of this.

"what are you doing in my room, on my comp-"

"the reason I happened to be in your room on your computer have nothing to do with why you were talking to my father! a father I didn't even know off!" It looked as if mine and his emotions swapped as he looked dazed and confused for what to say and I could feel the rage and anger steaming of my skin. afraid that if he touched me I'd burn the very hands of this secretive liar.

"y/n please I can explain" I scoffed, the statement that always seems to pop up when someone has been found out, no where to run, nothing else to say. just explain then you big idiot.

I waited silently, ready for this big explanation that was coming.

"its a long story I don't know where to start," preferably from the beginning would be nice.

my eyes didn't falter away from his panicked state. he was unmoving, silent, like he'd already given up. this was torturous, how could he have nothing to say, this man who I've confided in about my father, my family, pretty much cried in his arms, and he throws this in my face. stone cold silence! I wasn't having it. this was bullshit.

while he remained mute I stood up from the bed I had sat on to hear this extraordinary explanation that I had now realised wouldn't come in the next hour let alone year. getting up and marching towards the door for only then did he turn around to grab at my arm, halting me to a haste stop.

"get off me, you've made it pretty clear you have nothing to share" his eyes looked begging, needy, like I was meant to feel sorry for his lack of communication. yanking my arm I proceeded out the door, trying to slam it but his arm was already intersecting my dramatic exit.

"stop!" turning around one last time it was useless, the anger was slowly but surely turning to sadness, confusion. this overgrowing emotion, I felt so dejected at what this all meant.

"you guys don't want me anymore." his face sunk, like all the air had left his body. "you're tired of me, is that why you asked about my parents to try pass me off on to them, after you found out one was dead you thought you'd go find the other. I don't get it. I thought-" I thought you liked me. "never mind what I thought. everything was a hoax, everything was a lie. we're any of your feelings legitimate, have you all just been amusing the idea of me here?" more silence.

"I get the picture. I'm clearly nothing, just like from the start. yoongi was right. everything he said." my throat found itself in a fit of laughter. it was uncontrollable. he was looking at me oddly now. "thats funny. wish I'd just listened to him and shot myself, maybe that would have done you some favours."