Bridging the Ancient ✓

Chapter 50

My steps are lighter, my heart fuller, my smile wider and brighter than it's been in years. There's a reason why, a reason I don't want to push farther than I already have but I can't stop thinking about it. Not after we escaped the treasure trove and make it out of the palace through the servant passageway or when we kept to the shadows on our way back to the inn.

The entire time, all I could think about was Renit's kiss. The one I had so desperately been waiting for and now that it's happened...I don't know where to go from here. If he doesn't want to go any further because of Darlene then I would completely understand—the prince shouldn't push farther than what he is comfortable with.

But if he wants to try this, if he wants to make it work, then I would be more than pleased to take part. The trouble is getting him to talk about something other than the last box and what we plan to do tomorrow to make it back to the capital. Important topics for conversation but all things we can save for later since I can't fully focus on those topics anyway.

Renit didn't speak the entire way back to the inn. It's as if his words had been shut off and he was too busy working out the puzzle inside his mind to speak. I didn't push him and I definitely won't now, not as he changes from his armor into a clean tunic and a pair of dark pants. He pulls socks over his feet while sitting on the edge of the bed and across the room, I slowly begin to unbuckle all the pieces to my armor.

A pile of Renit's weapons sits on the edge of the bed with him, weapons we'll have to take with us to Mailan since the prince lets nothing go to waste. If he's smart, he'll hand them out as gifts to those he cares about—he doesn't need that many weapons, he's said as such.

Unbuckling one strap and tugging it to the side, I say, "We don't have to go any further. Just so you know."

Renit slows, eyes darting to the floorboards instead of where they were settled on his legs. He doesn't even want to look at me, let alone talk.

"I've spent one hundred years forcing myself to feel guilty because of what happened to Darlene. I believed that I shouldn't be with anyone because I would dishonor her death. But I've realized that at some point, I need to let her go. If I know Darlene, I know she would want me to be happy," Renit explains.

I ignore the rest of the buckles and walk over to him, taking his face in my hands. Standing between his legs, I force him to look up at me. Those silver eyes are lined with exhaustion but also a new sense of calm after what happened in the treasure trove. At least that's what I hope is causing the disruption to his normally difficult demeanor.

"You don't owe me anything," I whisper. "If you want nothing to come from this, then we'll forget it ever happened in the first place."

Renit sighs, his eyes closing as I press my lips to his forehead and hope that is enough to conclude this conversation. It hurts enough knowing he might not want to be with me at all, but to know he can't bring himself to forgiveness over what happened to Darlene is worse. He shouldn't carry that guilt around with him, the pressure that weighs down on his shoulders.

"When I'm with you, I feel a little less war-torn." With my forehead pressed against his, I close my eyes and relish in those words, smiling to myself. A smile that Renit might catch if he is watching me at all or choosing to block out his visible sense for this moment—same as me. "Peace has never come easily, I've never known it, never had the chance to understand it. But when you're around, when you're...pissing me off and trying to make me laugh all at the same time, I think peace may feel like you."

Before I can stop it, I'm laughing against his forehead. My shoulders shake as I try to rein in that joy but Renit pulls me against him, arms wrapping around my back while my own slide around his neck. Then I'm kissing him again and my heart soars higher than it did before, my very being glittering with excitement, my only control belonging to the tiniest bit of strength I have left.

When I pull away, Renit is already smiling. And it's not because of a joke I made for a second of reprieve or because he's had a change of heart—but because he's genuinely happy. His face is a hair's breadth away from mine and along with his touch comes the sweet smell of summer rain. I'll never tire of that smell, not again. Not in all the years I'm alive and hopefully at his side.

"Darlene would be proud of you," I whisper.

Renit's shoulders slack as I rub my hands back and forth along their surface. Touches I've been trying to accomplish for weeks, I'm trying to make up for in a matter of minutes. "Oisin would have loved you," he offers in return.

It's a shame I'll never get to meet the boy, never get the chance to watch him grow. That was Renit's true family, will always be, and I'll be fine coming in whatever place Renit wants to put me. I'm not here to help him forget about the past, I'm here to help him tuck that part of his life away, into his heart, and remember it for later. Always keep it close but don't let the past overwhelm your life—learn from it, trust it if you have to, embrace it.

And I think that's what Renit is doing here. This is why we found each other. He was my freedom, and I was his revival. Through all the hate, we finally made it.

Sliding out of his reach, I plop down on the side of the bed next to him. There isn't anything for us to do now other than sleep and although my temptations want to take me farther than that kiss, I don't want our first time to be in a rickety bed in Lona—a bed that is older than both of us combined. I can wait to explore Renit; as long as it takes for him to feel comfortable enough with me is however long I'm willing to wait. There is still hesitation in his touch but we'll reach that point of no return, sooner or later.

"I didn't get the chance to tell you earlier, but you looked beautiful in that gown," Renit compliments. His grin is nothing short of devilish. I'll have to get used to this new version of the prince, one that brings along a smirk with everything he says. Maybe Renit is more like Silas than I expected. He's kept that part of him hidden for so long that it's hard to bring back.

Resting my chin on my fist, I say, "Hmm."

Noticing my smirk, Renit jerks his chin. "What? Do you have something to say, spitfire?"

"I was just going to say that your wandering eyes said enough. You couldn't have been more obvious." I mockingly knock my knee against his and the prince shakes his head. The most handsome, the strongest, the witch with the biggest heart that he's kept hidden for so long. At this moment, the beginning of what is coming between us, all I want to do is relish in every aspect of his existence.

And I want nothing more than to rid him of his troubles. I always have, ever since our powers bonded together and with him as...more than a friend, that desire is even stronger inside my heart. When we get back to the castle, I'll make a point to figure things out for him. He won't be in his father's clutches for much longer, not if I have anything to say about it.

"I was the obvious one? For weeks now, all you've done is stare at me lovingly," Renit counters. He brushes his finger against my nose and I bat his hand away but intertwine my fingers with his. The warmth of the band on his finger presses against my skin and I run my thumb over it, savoring in the fact that the ring belongs to me, as does part of his heart.

I'm not ready to rid myself of his touch...not yet. Not for a while.

For my sake, Renit feels the same way because before I know it, I'm swept up in his lips again and I completely forget all danger taking place outside of this inn room. The back of my head presses against the bed, Renit's weight on top of me, and all else except for my fluttering heart is merely an afterthought.