The Solider and the Doctor

chapter 6

After they worked out they took showers and decided to just hang out and catch up. "So tell me what's your favorite part about being a surgeon?" Gabe asked. Meghan groaned and said "where do i start? It's an absolute rush. You don't know what it's like to be the one thing between your patient and death, its terrifying but so satisfying when you check on them in post op and they're surrounded by family and friends. I feel like i go into another world when I'm in the OR." He nodded his head, smiling at how excited she'd had just gotten when talking about it. She grinned, "what's your favorite part about being a soldier?" He shrugged, "I'm a part of something so much bigger than myself. I mean i know i have taken people from this earth but i have also saved many lifes and to see all of y'all here and happy, it makes it all worth it." She nodded as she watched him. He bumped her shoulder, "hey can i ask you something?" She shrugged, "sure go ahead." He looked at her and said, "earlier when i was talking about my mom you said something about being a mother.. what was that about?" She held a sad smile and began, "i don't think you want to know, gabe." He turned his body toward her "i do though." She took a deep breath, "are you sure?" He nooded. "Okay. Well after you left i was broken. I couldn't eat, i felt like i couldn't beathe with out pain shooting through my heart, all i wanted to do was sleep because it was easier. When i got home i had a letter waiting for me telling me i got accepted into medical school. So i sat infront of a mirror and told myself "you're worth so much more. You are going to become a surgeon and you're going to fix people. You are smart and anyone would be lucky to have you." I know it sounds dumb but it honestly helped. Anyway i started at the hospital and i was so busy with everything i didn't even notice that i had missed my period until i started almost 2 and a half months later and my cramps where so bad that i had to take off work for a couple days. I had an appointment with my gynecologist soon so i just figured I'd bring it up to her and see what she said. Well she examined me and asked about the period and everything and even did labs. She came to tell me that i had miscarried likely due to my stress levels being high and how much i was on my feet.." She sat there looking at her feet, "i had no intention of ever seeing you again or you ever knowing, i didn't tell anyone either because there was no use but i felt even more broken than i had before. I started to question myself on If i can't even do the one thing a woman's body is designed to do, can i do anything right? I.." her voice broke and tears began to stream down her face. Gabe sat there in disbelief as he listened to her, "That would have been my baby. They would have been mine." She nodded with out saying a word. She leaned her head back trying to stop the tears, but they just kept coming. Gabe reached over and pulled her into his arms and the dam broke. She bawled and finally let herself feel the loss of her baby, their baby. Gabe held her, rubbing her back as he pictured the family they could've had.

After she had cried all that she could she remained in Gabe's arms. He had leaned back and pulled her to lay on him and moved to stroking her hair because he knew it calmed her. "I wish I would have known. Maybe i could have been there or done something." She sniffled, "by the time i found out you were in basic and it was too late anyway." He continued to rub her head, "you would've been a great mother. And i could've been a great father. We could've been happy." She leaned up and looked at him, "have you not been happy for these past several years?" Her face was red and her eyes puffy and she stared at him with her big blue eyes that showed every emotion she had bottled up for years. "Not really." Was all he said before he pulled her back down to his chest and resumed his movements. "You didn't even tell SJ?" He said more himself than to her, but she answered. "He would have urged me to tell you and make a minds and i wasn't capable of facing you." Silence fell.

Soon she feel asleep in his arms. He layed there wide awake listening to her breath and felt afraid, like if he moved he would lose her again. Then again he was the one that left her in the first place. She will never know how much it hurt him to leave her. He saw her on the floor, he saw her heart break, he watched her crumble. He walked away, he knew she was dying on the other side of the door and he left her to. What kind of man was he? He broke the heart of the only person that ever truely loved him with out a doubt. Before long he found himself slipping into slumber himself.

He was pulled awake by the movements of meg and she snuggled closer into his chest, he smiled down at her as he watched her slowly wake up. "Hey there" he said her eyes met his and she slowly smiled "hey" she replied in a sleepy voice. She leaned up and crawled off gabe, to which he made a face at.

He watched as she walked into the kitchen and put the kettle on the stove. He finally got up and walked towards her. She looked up and really looked at him, "the army did him really good" she thought as her eyes scanned his body. He slightly smirked at seeing her check him out, but before he could say something her phone began to ring. "Hello?" She answered. She listened as her face started to contort. "No, its okay. Start prepping him and i will be in soon." Gabe felt his heart drop because she had to leave. She hung up and rubbed her face. "You have to go to surgery?" He asked. She nodded and sighed "I'm not on call but the head cardiovascular surgeon is elbow deep in someone's chest and I'm the next in line." He nodded "that must mean you're good." She smiled at that statement, "i didn't work my ass off to be mediocre. I'll be right back, I'm gonna go get my bag then I'm gonna head out." He nodded and watched her go up the stairs "damn." He thought.

Soon they were departing and he was dropping her off at the hospital even though she protested and wanted to walk. He felt right with her in these moments. He knew that she was his and she was going to be his forever.